As I Walk

November 18, 2016
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As I walk down this long road ahead of me, with all it’s bumps and jolts, I think to myself, “where am I going, and what will I become?” The wind whistles past my head. It tries to knock me down into the great abyss of time, where the road will swallow me up, into its black hole of depression and “ I wish I did this,” or, “I wish I did that.” The road curves at unexpected angles, like a babbling brook flowing past me. I plunge deeper into the road that lies ahead, and find misfortunes and small triumphs. The dark, rotting forest, with trees gnarled, and dead grasses, all bend with the wind, almost pointing, me, it seemed, to give up and turn around, and the wind is even more persuasive, with it’s powerful push, trying to put me back where I belong. Nowhere. Trapped in the middle of somewhere and nowhere, not sure whether to go forward, down the road again, or to wallow in the unchallenged intersection of the road, where the wind wants me so badly to go. Where you are stuck in indecision, waiting for someone or something to give you a push in the right direction. I won’t go there. I can’t. I can’t let this beating road push me back. I have been pushed shoved, yelled at, and scolded. But for what? I won’t stop moving. But what happened that frightful day. That terrible day? I pushed too hard and fell flat on my face, smack down in the middle of the road of life. I tried to stand, but couldn’t. For the wind was strong and held me down, the insults carried over the wind. They pecked at me like birds, tearing away at me. I sat there and let it happen, as helpless as a tree being chopped down. I pushed and pushed, and finally got to my knees. I pushed some more and got to my feet. I fought forward, through the barrage of everything nasty and cruel. But I can’t stop now. Up ahead, I see a house. I opened the creaky old door and stepped in. There, in the one chair, and one piece of furniture, slumped an old man. Gray hair, gnarled fingers, and yellow teeth, staring right at me. “Who are you?” I asked. After a long pause the old man replies, “ I am you. You are I. In the future. Welcome to safety, kid. Take your seat” I paused, and realized my journey was over. All of the sudden, the man turned into a pile of white dust, and he few out the window, carried on a gust of wind. As I took my seat in that chair, I fell into a state of deep sleep. I awoke to a sight, which I thought I never would see. A place like no other. The grass was green, the trees were lush, and the water was as clear as country air. I heard a voice from behind. “So you’re finally here.” I turned, to see a woman, clad in robes of white silk, with beautiful black hair. “Who are you?” I asked in wonder. “I am hope,” she replied. “Welcome to the peace beyond the road of life. “Am I dead,” I asked? “ No boy, you are more alive than you’ll ever be. With that, my world started to melt around me, and I awoke in that chair, old and looking exactly like that old man. I felt a jolt as I awoke a second time. I realized with a start, that I was back at the beginning of that awful road. I forgot almost everything from what had happened, except that I knew I had to move forward to better things. Little did I realize, that half of my being was trapped in that old man. I pushed forward once again, as a young man, not realizing how many time I had made this journey before. Once again, I set out on the road of life.


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