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A Modest Proposal: A Satirical Solution to Poverty
FOR PREVENTING THE ESCALATION AND LONG TERM PERPETUATION OF POVERTY IN THE UNITED STATES
It is a melancholy object to those who live in the United States and own a home to see so many people living in poverty in the inner cities. It will put a feeling of guilt in their minds because they feel as if they are not giving back to their community. It is alarmingly scary at how it affects the look or image of our nation as well as future generations. Poor economy and a low minimum wage are responsible for people living on the streets, having inadequate health care, and lack of secondary education. It affects people that barely make enough to support their families and it also affects the people who have to sadly watch it happen. In the near future it will cause high rates of crime where the poverty is occurring, sickness because of the inability to provide for the correct care, and illiteracy because the parents will be unable to provide the proper education for their children.
I think it is agreed by all parties that the life threatening occurrence of high poverty levels in the United States should be at the top of our priority list. Whoever has the incredible ability to come up with a logical but affordable solution to end poverty and decrease its long term effects should be given ungodly amounts of money and national recognition.
But my intention is far from being confined to provide only for the betterment of today and future generations’ well being. It will be for the economy and bringing people together as one community, but at the same time separated by location. This will be beneficial to all because they will not be affected by people in other states with different opinions on their way of life. Everyone will have a responsibility within the community to better society today and in the future.
As to my own part, I have studied proposals of other projectors, and concluded that they are not nearly as efficient as they claim to be. Creating simple solutions to decrease the poverty level such as increasing minimum wage, creating jobs, supporting pay equality, providing paid leave and sick days, investing in childcare and early education, and expanding medicaid will not give enough effect to completely and efficiently solve the high poverty levels. Within the next five years, with only these solutions in action I can infer that almost everyone will be living on the streets, starving to death. I propose that rather than take these steps slowly and hope that people will act upon them, we should obliterate those ways and create a solution that is faster, better, stronger, and more effective for everyone, and that betters society as a whole.
I will now present my own idea, which I hope will not be subject to any disagreement.
I humbly offer it to the public consideration that humankind as a cohesive and cooperative unit, should not own each of their own homes for their very own family. Everyone's homes would be destroyed and replaced with something much better and more useful for everyone as a whole. This is exaggeration because not literally every home will be completely destroyed, some homes will be used to build the new home for that state. The homes will not just disappear.
In this scenario, we will have one large home for each state and everyone who lives in that state will live in that home. Due to everyone living together, families will have certain jobs around the house that they are required to perform. Everyone will stay happy and no one will have to live on the streets. This is situational irony because we are not expecting everyone to stay happy if they will be living in one house with millions of people.
Of course, people will have fights or arguments because not everyone is used to living with that many people. Everyone will be assigned a specific room and everyone will be forced to stay within their own quarters. Instead of people choosing their own occupations with higher and lower paying wages, everyone will be payed the same and rotate between jobs. Those jobs could be farming, cooking, cleaning, repairmen/women, electricians, teachers, doctors, and plumbers. Each person under 40 (to keep the community strong, young, and healthy) will provide for their family and learn each of these jobs and rotate between them every week to a different one. This is a reversal because normally the children and younger aged people are not doing all of the housework and care for the family. It is usually the other way around where the parents will do all of that.
These drastic and sudden changes to individual states and the entire nation will be difficult for all of the people. It will be hard to figure out where to put everyone while the home is being built, but in the end it will all work out. People will be able to depend on each other because the jobs are going to be getting done by each individual. Everything is solved and it will be perfect.
I can think of no valid objection that may be introduced to antagonize this proposal unless people believe that living as one big family could never work because people wouldn't get along. These people are wrong. Everyone will be playing a vital role in order to survive in that newly formed society. Each person will need to depend on another person, who depends on another person, and so on. We will all need each other in order to survive, so you have no room for disagreements or arguments.
Again, no one should dare to suggest these notions to me until they have a small spark of hope that these actions may be implemented.
It is not that I do not respect the input of others on the subject of solutions to this topic, but simply that I have thought and thought for almost a billion years now about the foolproof solution to solve poverty. I truly do not foresee any solution as close to as perfect as mine. It is basically the only solution plausable to completely get rid of poverty because everyone else's will take too long and will only solve a portion of poverty.