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"The light from the street lamp below shone into my window. I had not been able to fall asleep that evening for the fair yellow glow reminded me of my past. If once it was a painful past, it will always be. As I walked toward the light, I noticed my window open and I felt a slight chill on my face. Yet, as I stepped into the light, I felt a warm tingling sensation, as if someone was kissing my cheek. I looked up into the sky hoping to see my family again. All at once, I shut my eyes, not thinking for a moment that this was the last time that I would ever see that wonderful sky.
"From the midst of the empty room I heard a voice calling my name in the form of a beautiful enchanting tune. The sound was so magnificent that I could no longer bear to ignore the mystery of who would have such a lovely voice. This masterpiece reminded me of the times that my aunt spent the night and sung me a lullaby. That lullaby was so beautiful that it put me to sleep whenever I heard it. It was peculiar for me to hear this bedtime song in the middle of the night; besides, it was an impossible since my aunt had passed away many, many years ago. I prepared to open my eyes and search for the enigmatic woman, yet my attempt was useless and my body limp, except for my ears. The music stopped. The light of the street lamp was no longer in my vision. No more stars. No more lullabies. All I had left were songs of the past.
"I was unaware that others had entered my apartment during this phenomenon, since my eyes seemed to be permanently shut and my body seemed to be permanently stationary. During the passing years of my life, my mother had died when I was five years old, my father when I was 14, my aunt when I was 17, my sister when I was 29 years old. As they died so did my hopes and dreams. Therefore, I had no understanding of who could be in my apartment I had no one. After that my life fell apart and it was almost pointless to go on living as a miserable young man. I had nothing left My relatives appeared to me in my dreams, yet when I woke I came to the reality of my empty house, longing for loved ones to fill it. My efforts to find a wife were useless as well. I had no motivation to pick myself up and search for a family who needed me as much as I needed them.
"I knew that I needed something. The long nights I spent pondering what to say when I finally saw my relatives again were of no use until that night. Finally, I stopped thinking and let my ears wander. I heard the most amazing thing I will never forget it. I heard the sound of a baby boy crying, then a joyful laugh, the song "Happy Birthday." Cheers among many people and then another cry. I made the assumption that this was the cry of joy that happens when a miracle arrives in someone's life ... though unfortunately for me, I had never felt that sensation. It appeared that I had just heard the music of life, and when the music stopped, I could see again.
"As I looked around the room, I saw no one. I stood up, pleased that my body was mobile again, and walked to the mirror. What my eyes saw was totally incredible. Images of my family were there and they were sifting and eating a meal. I was there too. After the meal, I saw someone lying on a bed. Everyone was going and kissing his forehead, yet he gave no response. I noticed the baskets, bouquets of flowers and fruits and I knew what was happening. I figured that I should pay my respects to the deceased, so I went over to give a kiss in hopes of a more peaceful place for him. I looked deep into his eyes and examined his face. It wasn't true, yet it had to be, for the only thing I could ever trust were my eyes. They had never deceived me: the face was my own. The body was my own.
"By the time I sorted out where I was and what had happened, I realized that I had just been digging myself deeper into a pit of despair ... until I saw the most beautiful thing in the world. I left the body only for a moment and when I turned back, my eyes saw a transparent figure with large angel-like wings. Her body was gone and she whispered to me softly, "It's time."
"Her ways were so mysterious. On my own instinct, I followed her. She stopped and motioned to come closer. I stepped slowly, not knowing what to say or do, and when I finally reached her, she told me to close my eyes. I did. When I opened them again, I was back in my apartment. There, waiting for me, were my mother, father, sister, and aunt who I would have given my life to see. I knew that I was never waking up. It was worth it to see them again. I went over to my mother and opened my arms to hug her. My arms, transparent now, went right through her. I had no sense of touch or feel. I had been waiting so long for this moment and it was distressing that the enchantress from above had led me only to find that my family could feel no love for me, and I none for them.
"The enchantress was only a messenger. There was nothing that she could have said or done to change the way that things would turn out for me. So I accepted the fact that I could no longer feel what I once called love. As my family slipped away into the shining sunlight, I said my last farewells, realizing just then that my family was gone forever."
He pulled the paper away from the doctor very quickly. A dark shadow covered his face and yet a smile remained. Enough had been said. There would be no more of these far fetched stories, no more suicide attempts, and definitely no more living by his own free will. The decision was finally made that he would have to stay there permanently after he had been escorted back to his apartment to get his things. Though he had not been notified about these changes that were going to be entering his life, he knew.
A large man took him by the arm and sat him down in the back seat of a car. Through the tinted windows, he saw the world for the very last time; that familiar sky. When they arrived at his building, he was brought upstairs to his apartment and left to get his personal belongings. His escort stared out the window and admired the view of the sky. It was a clear and starry night and the street lamp shone into the window. He lay down in his bed for one last time and shut his eyes. His escort turned and picked up the almost empty bag. He went over to the bed and put his hand on the man's chest. He was not breathing. He dialed for an ambulance to come pick up the body.
He was ready to see his family. 1