Okay, so here I am. As I always was. The same. People always used to tell me that I should slow down and let the world catch up with me. Looks like the world passed me by. Not that I mind. I'm doing fine. See? I look pretty good, I have good grades, and I have lots of friends ... but all the same, I feel like something is missing. "Sure," you say, nodding knowingly. "That's always the case." But I really do. I feel as though ... oh, what do you care? I mean, to you I'm there, but not really there. I mean, you call me your friend, but I'm really just another face in the hall. Another person who sits with you at lunch. Another person you say hi to without even knowing her. You know me, but you don't know me. I'm not really there, just part of the scenery. I don't really mind. I could sit forever just watching you. Mr. Popularity. Mr. Center-of-Attention. But I have to admit, once in a while I wish you would notice me. Really notice me, not just recognize me, or pacify me. Of course, there was that one time ... you were walking down the hall in my direction. And for just one second you smiled. I know it wasn't directed toward me. Amy, the cheerleader, in front of me, or Katie, the class president, behind me, maybe. But for that moment, the world seemed to drift away. Listen to me. I sound like some character in a corny romance novel. I wish. I mean, I've had my share of romances, if you can call them that. But never something that felt like this, like it was meant to be. You know - look out Romeo and Juliet, here comes ... me. Hey, I'm probably boring you now. So I'll just go. Maybe someday I'll catch up to you. For now I'm just going to try to catch up with the rest of the world!
This piece has been published in Teen Ink’s monthly print magazine.