hello.
my name is clara.
i don’t remember my last name.
i don’t even remember my first name anymore.
i chose the name clara
because i like the way it feels
on my tongue.

today is the day that I died.
six years ago.
i took my own life.
because of a boy.
this is about a boy.
i am about a boy.

hello.
my name is clara.
i met the boy in my family’s new house.
the basement.
i was sorting boxes.
photo albums.
baby dolls.

he sat on a box next to me.
i didn’t see him at first.
he spoke.
hello, he said.
i very near fainted from shock.

hello.
my name is clara.
i fell in love with this boy.
he called himself michael.
i called him my savior.

it was three weeks before I learned
of his death
twenty-two years ago.
he was murdered in cold blood.
murdered.

hello.
my name is clara.
the boy I loved was killed by
an unidentified man.
the man killed him for being
“too pretty.”

mother grew concerned with my
antisocial behavior.
she asked my if i was
making friends.
i said yes.

hello.
my name is clara.
my boy is pretty.
his hair is shaggy.
blonde.

he wears an outfit of all black.
a misfits tee.
acid washed jeans.
a virtual kurt cobain.
dark empty eyes.

hello.
my name is clara.
my time on earth is almost up,
but first i must tell you
how i died.

michael told me he had to go.
he asked me to come with him.
he said that if i died,
we could touch.
i could feel his skin on mine.

hello.
my name is... clara.
i had to die bloody,
oh, so bloody,
to join my boy in the limbo
between life and death.

he told me what to do.
i took the knife.
(my parents left home.)
i took the knife,
and plunged it right into my gut.

hello.
my name is... claire?
my boy stood and watched me
bleed out
all over the basement.

he smirked.
he mocked me.
i fell for him
and he had me kill myself
so he could be freed from the limbo.

hello.
my name is claire.
i chose this name because
i like the way it feels
on my tongue.

now i sit,
waiting.
waiting for another fool.
to come along
and set my soul free.

hello.
my name is claire.
and i am fading from here
next year i shall return
and hopefully find someone to die for me.