Thinking

September 12, 2008
By
She looked out the window. Nothing was happening. Nothing ever happens, but it became more interesting than the ceiling she had been staring at for the past two hours. It’s good to clear your mind and just stare off into space for a while. Not thinking. Thinking sucks. Most of the time anyway… The doorbell may have rang, and the phone probably did too. But for once she was happy. Thoughtless and happy, so why would she destroy that feeling?
Most people spend their summer vacation doing stuff. But all she did was try to acquire a job, and she only did so because her mother had stopped giving her money. She saw her friends on the rarest of occasions. She spoke to them slightly more often, on the computer or the phone. It’s funny. If anybody felt like this in the 1800s they would have been lost, or sent to an asylum. Probably the latter. But she probably would have plenty of time to stare, at an asylum full of real lunatics. The nurses would have to tend to them first, of course.
It would be an hour or so until her aunt arrived home and hours after her mother would probably show up. Or not. The longer alone the better, in her opinion. As long as she doesn’t think about being alone. Thinking. Solemnity can be nice if you avoid that. If you do think, though, you are in great danger of breaking out in tears. Crying is best when done when your sure nobody will see you. Her aunt could come home early for all she knew. If she started crying she wouldn’t be able to stop. Therefore she could not think.
Suddenly she hears a sound from a distance. Its music, coming through the window. It ruins everything, of course. To avoid thinking she busies herself eating, or wandering. It’s all she can do. Thinking.





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