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The Adventures of Captain Simon and Paul the Panda: Air Sickness

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The taillights of the car faded off behind the hill. Once that happened, the duo began yet another adventure. “Did you see those two kids today on the bus?” Paul asked Captain Simon. “What kids?” Captain Simon asked, “There were probably a hundred kids on this bus today, maybe even more.” Paul glared over at Captain Simon. “Well no duh!” he told Captain Simon in a sarcastic tone, “Congratulations, Sherlock!” Captain Simon glared back at Paul. “Those two from the high school,” Paul said. “Well now, let’s see,” Captain Simon began to ponder something. “Don’t tell me there were fifty kids on that bus, I know that already,” Paul interrupted Captain Simon’s train of thought. “I wasn’t going to tell you that,” Captain Simon said, “I was going to tell you that there were MORE than fifty kids on the high school bus today.” Paul was getting really ticked with Captain Simon. “Oh, by the way,” Captain Simon began, “That’s Captain Sherlock, you can’t forget the one who’s in charge here.” Paul glared even harder at Captain Simon now.

“It was the two in the third…no fourth row. One had some funny sock monkey hat on, the other had like… a gazillion trillion cowlicks,” Paul said. “First off,” Captain Simon said, “Yes, I did see those kids. Second, why do you care? Third, gazillion trillion isn’t a number.” Paul really glared at Captain Simon now. He began swinging himself. He smashed into Captain Simon. Captain Simon let out a squeak. “What was that for?” he asked Paul. Paul ignored Captain Simon. “Did you look at the two kids?” he asked Captain Simon. “Well no duh!” Captain Simon responded. He then used his new momentum to smash into Paul. “Boom!” he yelled, “Sweet revenge!”

Now it was on. Paul used the new momentum to smash back into Captain Simon. With each volley of body slamming, more and more momentum was added to each hit. After about five minutes of this, Paul had an idea. He started swinging himself in a different direction. When Captain Simon came down for his hit, Paul swung out of his way. The string that held to two companions together began to wind around itself. The duo was sent into a spinning frenzy.

Eventually, Paul and Captain Simon smashed into each other and the spinning stopped. “Uhgn…” Captain Simon said, “I feel sick to my stomach.” “Oh no you don’t!” Paul said worriedly, “Hold it in. Do not barf! I repeat do not barf!” “Didn’t you know I get air sick?” Captain Simon asked Paul. “Air sick, never heard of it,” he responded. By now the duo began to spin in the opposite direction. “Can’t… hold… it…” Captain Simon complained. “No, no, NO!” Paul yelled. But it was too late. Captain Simon let loose and the whole front dash board and windshield were covered in… “YUCK!” Paul screamed as he became instantly soaked in… Captain Simon let loose again.

“We…we need to… stop… to stop this,” Captain Simon stuttered. Paul Began swinging himself away from Captain Simon. He suddenly had an idea. He reached out and grabbed the fan. The spinning stopped instantly. Captain Simon was no longer a happy yellow, he was a sick green. He turned to look at Paul. “Thanks,” he croaked. Paul disconnected both Captain Simon and himself from the black string. While Captain Simon rested, Paul uncapped the box labeled “Bodily Fluid Clean Up Kit”. “I think this is a case containing bodily fluids,” he said to himself. “What was it about those two kids you were going to say earlier?” Captain Simon asked Paul. “Well,” Paul began, “They were looking at both of us kind of weird.” “So?” Captain Simon said, “It’s not like they are going to create a fictional short story series about our adventures? What are the chances of that?” “Not very high I guess,” Paul responded.



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