Death Will Take you at the Next Window

August 8, 2012
At eleven o' clock sharp the marta bus makes its usual stop on the corner of 3rd street. It is ten-fifty six and old Mrs. Jackson is crossing the street into open traffic. Death was waiting patiently.

"Come on Mrs. Jackson, I've been waiting for this all morning."

Only a few more steps and a car would hit poor old Mrs. Jackson. However, today was Mrs. Jackson lucky day. A young man grab old Mrs. Jackson’s arms and assisted her to the bus stop.

"Gosh, one more step and you would have been killed!", exclaimed the young man

"That's the point!" Screamed Death.

Death was not one bit happy.

"Great...another one saved! She couldn't have died for breast cancer! Why? Cause the damn medicine these days!"

At that moment old man Jerry walked by. Now Death was even more upset.

"And you! You had to strive Vietnam and come back a hero didn't you?! Honestly, I took your arm for crying out loud! But, no the medics got to you before I did."

Death looked around and decided to take a walk to clear his mind.

"Honestly, what's a guy got to do these days to make a livin? Back in the day, people would be dropping like flies! What happened to the plague! Small poxes! I mean, come on! Diarrhea was enough to kill a guy! I even thought AIDS would do more damage!....Well, at this rate...i might have to get a new job. I guess it's time to hang up the old robes and start looking around."

Death went back home and started typing out his resume and the next day he put on his blackest and shiniest robe for his interviews.

The next day Death went all around town to look for a job, with no success. he tried to get a job at a car dealership, but his "skills" would hurt the safety ratings of the new models. Than Death tried to get a job at a national park, but his presence caused most of the moose and fox population endangered. Death even tried to get a job in politics. However, the people reminded him too much of his roommates in the Underworld. Death was slowly running out of options. Death decided that there was one more place that he could visit.

"Hello sir, now what makes you think that you are qualified to work at our business?"

Death was a bit nervous, but he only spoke the truth, "Um, well. As you can see in my resume I put in many hours into my job and I have been doing my old job for a while now, but like all things there comes a time when the adventure dies and I feel that a new change was needed."

"Alright then, now what were some things that you accomplished in your last job...Mister.."


"yes of course, Mr. Reaper."

"Well, I took a great deal of lives at The Battle of Antietam, but one of my more recent ones was the Ma Lay Massacre. I also took a lot of lives at Wounded Knee, Yorktown, D-day, but one of my greatest accomplishments was the Bubonic Plague."

"So Mister Reaper, your specialty is taking lives without any mercy or grief?"

"Yes ma'am that would be correct."

"Well, that was all I needed to hear! Your perfect for the job! Congratulations! Welcome to the McDonald's team! You can start work right away!"

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