Once upon a chaotic and backwards time in a land not so far away lived young girl who thought she had no worth. Little did she know, this is how all teenaage girls feel and soon she learned to write to release her thoughts and ideas. There was happiness and peace throughout the land until a dark cloud came to settle over society. This young girl would soon discover the most terrifying thing yet... public high school. As she settle into the world of "discipline" (a.k.a. anarchy), and "routine" (a.k.a. boredom)in order to help her "grow up into a mature adult who contributes to this great country" (a.k.a. just grow up, you wear too much black and we don't like your music young lady,) the young girl soon realized she must forfeit her right to breath, speak, and daydream. T'was on her second year of this ridiculously cruel and unusual way of shoving us with information that she heard the most horrifying news of all. She must surrender her writing. The young girls English 2 Honors teacher gleefully reported to the class that they must each submit a piece of their work to a company that will scrutinize, criticize, and disparage their innocent and beautiful writing. If the company then decides that they approve of this submited work they shall then promptly steal the right to now own it for their own and you have no more right to it at all (unless you wish to secretly gaze upon your work at night under the covers in your secret journals and notebooks of course). It was on this tragic day that the young maiden fled to the library during her lunch period, sat down at one of the computers, and swiftly typed the crappiest, corniest thing that she could think of in five minutes and submitted it in hopes that she would not have to surrender her finer work. In the end everyone lived happily ever after: the young girl did not have to surrender her work, the teacher was happy with the proof of submission anyways, and the magazine she was writing to probably got plenty of other submissions to choose from. Thank you for your time and don't forget to tip your waitress.
April 15, 2008