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Humpty Dumpty

By , Oak Park, IL
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall

Humpty Dumpty blah blah blah

Everyone knows the story but no one really knows for sure how it happened. Some say he was trying to be a gymnast and was up there working on his beam routine. Others say he was just up there for the view or maybe hiding for an Easter egg hunt. Others still thought he was writing a hard-boiled crime fiction. But only I know the real reason.
* * *
Once upon a time in a faraway land there was a fat little egg named Humpty Dumpty. He wore specially tailored, royal blue lederhosen to fit his fat, little egg bottom. He was a happy egg even though he was quite lonely after his girlfriend left him for a free-ranger. He missed her and was secretly hoping that she would realize her terrible, terrible mistake and come back to him.

On that fatal morning as he hobbled along the wall by his house on his way to his yearly check-up with Dr. Eggsamine, he ran into Rita and her new boyfriend Chuck.

“Hey Rita, Chuck,”

“Hey Humpty, where’re you headed,” Rita said.

“Oh, just the doctor. It’s just my yearly.”

“That’s great!” And they began to walk away. He was beginning to think he should call after her but he didn’t have time for anything because then he was falling. What had happened? He walked over that wall everyday why had he fallen? Maybe subconsciously he had jumped? No, he loved life he wasn’t suicidal. He looked up and saw chuck starring down at him, not a drop of emotion on his face. He had been pushed, but that’s not what everyone else saw. Only me, I saw that rotten egg chuck stick his foot out and trip him. I didn’t know what to do so I pushed chuck off to avenge my poor Humpty. Humpty survived. Chuck broke his fall.





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