Today, I am celebrating my first birthday. Yes, I guess you could say that one year ago my parents’ lives were forever changed and so were many other lives. One year ago I brought my parents so much joy when I first entered the world bearing my full head of beautiful nut-brown hair (alright, you caught me… I guess I only had a little bit of hair, but that’s beside the point) and my big, twinkling blue eyes. Coming into the world at 8 pounds, 3 ounces I was a gift to the world. Both my mommy and daddy were filled to the brim with joy and emotion that I knew I was something real special from the start. It was only after a few weeks that I noticed just how special I really am.
It was only after a few weeks after my birth that I discovered how special and different I am from all the other babies in the world. I discovered that I’m not just normal. It was when my parents brought me home from the hospital that I was first exposed to this special treatment. It was a warm, breezy March afternoon in Los Angeles when the hospital was finally able to release me. After a couple of weeks of being cooped up in this dreary place people call a “hospital” I was ready to go home. I never clearly understood why the nurses and doctors were keeping in the hospital for so long. I knew I was able to hold my own and could handle any obstacle the world could give me. But, because my parents strangely agreed to this request, I had to stay captivated in this boring place. As you can clearly see, I was ready to discover the new world around me and start my adventures. My many other baby friends from the hospital told me many different rumors about smells and sights that I would encounter while experiencing the outer world. So, on March 20th, Mommy and Daddy came to the hospital at the peak of dawn to bring me home. I remember waking up extra early that morning because I was so excited to leave the hospital and go to my house (I’m not exactly sure what “house” means but it sounds like a pretty cool place. Mommy and Daddy talk about it a lot when I’m around.) After saying many goodbyes to the other unfortunate babies that had to remain in this dreadful place, I was on my way. Mommy scooped me up in her arms and carefully rocked me from side-to-side as she waited to say one last thank you to all the kind nurses. After saying our last goodbyes, Mommy, Daddy, and I were off to our home. My parents swiftly made their way through the hallways of the hospital without stopping for anyone or anything. It seemed to me that they were in a hurry. I wondered why and was getting a little perturbed at their hurriedness. I of course wanted to take in every scene that I passed but my parents’ fast walking did not allow me to do that. We finally made our way to the front door and were all greeted with a huge surprise outside. It seemed to me as if my parents knew it was coming because as soon as we crossed the doors to go outside, they broke into a swift walk and darted to a large, black shiny thing with wheels that was waiting for us. (I had heard rumors in the hospital that this contraption was called a car and would bring up home.) As my mommy swiftly walked to the car, carefully protecting me in her arms and shielding me away from the outside world, I was able to see out from underneath a gap between the blanket I was tightly swaddled in and her arms. As my eyes adjusted to the light, I noticed a crowd surrounding our car. Many different people were surrounding us and carrying weird black boxes that let off random flashes of a bright light in my and my mommy’s face. All of these strangers were shouting things like, “Hey! Hey Natalie! NATALIE PORTMAN! Look here at the camera! What’s your baby’s name? We just want one shot of you and your beautiful baby!” All of these things confused me…. Who were all these strangers and why did they want to know my name? I mean, I knew I was special by the way my mommy and daddy talked to me and how all the nurses treated me, but why did strangers know I was special. I have to be honest though, I am definitely not complaining about this special treatment.

As soon as Mommy was able to strap me up in a car seat as fast and as safe as possible, she quickly sat in the back of the car with me and shut the car door tight. Daddy sat in the passenger’s seat and we were off. The car sped through the streets of Los Angeles as I watched the different images out the window smearing into one. This was the first time I overheard my parents complaining about the “paparazzi” (I guess that’s the technical term for all those strangers) and how inconsiderate they are. I was just about to protest the claim that the paparazzi are inconsiderate when the car suddenly came to a stop. My mommy quickly got out of the car and walked around the back of the car to unbuckle me from my seat. I didn’t understand why everyone was in such a hurry. I mean, I was looking forward to spending some time outside enjoying all the new sights and smells but as soon as I was unbuckled, I was scooped up in one smooth motion and taken inside to our home. As I was in my mother’s arms being caressed and cuddled, I once again heard my parents’ complaining about the paparazzi. My mommy was saying how, “Those people can never leave us alone! All I want is to be able to come into my own home without being bombarded with questions about,’ How is the new baby? What’s his name? Can we get a few pictures of him?’ Why can’t they leave us alone?” My daddy quickly agreed and complained about them too. While this complaining session was going on, I was wondering why my parents seemed so mad. I would have loved to have my picture taken. Strangers love me already! I don’t even have to do anything for people to already love me.

After that day, I have discovered some more reasons as to why our family receives special treatment. The first and most obvious reason is because I’m such a loveable baby. I mean, how could anyone dislike me? I’m dangerously cute and able to get whatever I want by making cute faces. Another thing I discovered is my parents are “celebrities.” I don’t exactly know what this means but I will eventually find out, I know I will. I guess that is the reason why I have found my picture on the cover of magazines and on many different websites. But I still think the main reason why people love reading about me or seeing my pictures is because I am so adorable and easy to love. I have such a loveable personality; even my “celebrity” parents tell me so. I mean, I have even seen website articles that are titled, “Cute Alert! Natalie Portman’s Baby Aleph Makes His Full-Face Debut.” I have to admit… it must not be because of my “celebrity” parents, but purely based on my good looks and adorable personality.