Anything But Perfect | Teen Ink

Anything But Perfect

March 16, 2012
By Chelseaed SILVER, West Valley, New York
Chelseaed SILVER, West Valley, New York
8 articles 0 photos 0 comments

“My life is perfect, everyone wants to be me,” the words taste sour as she stands on the ledge pacing. The night sky is full of bright stars, opportunities, always so many there but never within reach. All the pressures she’s gone through, all the things she has given up just to live up to everyone else’s expectations that are impossible to reach still haunt her. She’s done. She can’t do it anymore. It’s about time she did something about it.
She continues to think about her life and how she got to this point: the point where she would do anything to be in control of at least one thing in her being. Pacing she stares up at the stars again still thinking about her life. That’s just it, it’s her life, yet everyone else controls it, who she is and who she has to be. No one ever asks her what she wants; it’s just what they think and how she has to act based on their desires.
She has the perfect look with her straight blond hair that lies softly at the middle of her back, her bright blue eyes, and her smile that could fit up with the stars in the sky, so she has been told anyway. She has the perfect house, the perfect family, and the perfect life, at least that is what everyone else thinks. They have no idea. No one does.
From when she was a little girl up until this very moment she has felt this way. When she was little though she didn’t quite understand, why does everyone else have to make decisions for her? Why is she always expected to be everything everyone else wants? Whatever happened to just being yourself? Those questions shadowed her every move during her childhood. She now knows the answers, everyone expects perfection and when they are given just one ounce of it, they want more. Her parents, her teachers, even her “friends” pressure her. That stops now.
She stops pacing and just faces the water far below her perfect feet. She thinks just one thing, she sees just one word, and she does just that. She jumps thinking about her anything but perfect death on the way down. She can’t help but feel anything but a mix of fear, warmth, and finality as she finally ends everything she always knew wasn’t perfect.


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