Hi. My name is Tess and I suffer from AUA, otherwise known as acute unattractiveness. I contracted the disease from birth due to an unfair arrangement of genes from my parents, both carriers of the gene. I have been AUA positive for nearly twenty years now and the doctors say that I luckily have many more. It is a disease I struggle with daily and now, with therapy, I have gained the courage to share my story with you in the hopes that you too can be aware of AUA.
Acute unattractiveness, commonly known as the “Double-take Disease”, “The Ugly”, and “Daaaammmmnnn…” is a rare genetic disease, discovered in the United States around the early 1800s. Early sufferers of this disease were often shunned by society, forced to either work as entertainers in the side-show circus business, or go into hiding. Nearly 1.5% of all Americans suffer from this disease and there is currently no cure. I suffer from a rare form of AUA called nonvultus formosacorpusitis, or “butter face”. The doctors say that this is quite a “forgiving” type of AUA and that I am “blessed”. Sure.
I’m not gonna lie, living with AUA is hard. Middle school and high school were hell. I am not allowed to work near small children. I need specially made sunglasses for my facial structure. Ugh, and don’t even get me started on those ladies at the MAC counter at the mall. “I’m sorry honey, but we don’t have your shade”. Yeah right.
Explaining the disease to people (the open-minded ones, mind you) is even harder. You cannot get AUA from touching me, using my pencil, or sitting next to me at Ruby Tuesday’s. I am not contagious; if I accidently cough on you, you will not be plagued for life. I am a human being just like you. In fact, AUA comes with its advantages. The lack of attention from the opposite sex (once they see my face) may seem pressing at times, but there is a silver lining. I don’t have to worry about people liking me for my appearance. My lack of dates gives me more time to work on my extensive iTunes library (I could easily be the next deadmau5). And when I make a milkshake, none of the boys come to my yard. It’s great, more for me.
If anything, living with AUA has given me optimism in life. I don’t have many friends, but the friends I do have like me for my personality, not my double chin. I have a family that loves me. And my disease is considered a handicap, so I get the best parking spaces. I want people to understand that yes, I may not have a lot of hair and yes, my teeth may be perpetually yellow, and yes I look like the Wicked Witch of the West on a good day, but I am happy. The “Uglies” are just like you. I am ugly and I am proud.