You never really go into anything expecting to die. You always tell yourself, “That can’t happen to me. I’m not going to be the one, not today.” In all honesty it does seem that way. We’re never the victim; it’s always someone else who gets blown to pieces or shot. It’s always someone else, until it’s you. Those few quick seconds that you see the RPG screaming toward your Humvee are the most surreal, yet enlightening ones of your entire life. You wonder if you’ve made a difference in the world. You think back on everything you’ve done and decide whether or not you’re satisfied with your life. You can’t help but wonder what you could have done better or differently. You think about your family and how they will have to go on without you. You hope that you have done enough for them so that they remember you for the loving father and husband you tried so hard to be.
You think about all the wrong you’ve done and you silently apologize, hoping someone will hear you. You recall memories that you couldn’t before; birthdays, weddings, births, deaths, the good times and the bad. You come to the most important question of all; what happens next? Afterlife? Heaven? Hell? Nothingness? What? Just as you are deciding to wait and see what’s in store, an overwhelming white heat engulfs you. A mixture of fire and steel. Throughout this, your transformation from an observer to a victim, you are the most comfortable you have ever been in your entire life. You are comfortable because you know that what awaits you is freedom.