No matter how many times she tries to get back up, pick up the pieces and move forward something or someone pushes her back down. She continues to try to be strong she tries to fight for love or some type of happiness. She knows she shouldn’t give up because she’s still young and she still has her whole life ahead of her but now a day it seems like there’s no hope for her happiness. Her smile it’s fake yet no one seems to notice. At this point she doesn’t care if people notice or not. Her life hasn’t been the easiest she has gotten hurt enough to last a life time and she has dropped enough tears to over flow an ocean. Everyone in her life has slowly left her from family to friends and every relationship she’s ever had has ended in disaster. She has grown up strong and a fighter because at a very young age the one person who she honestly believed would never leave her side the one who she thought would be there to catch her if she fell just vanished without warning. Everything changed from that moment on her laughter was gone instead there were tears, her bravery was gone all that was left were her fears. She used to dream about the day that he would return, 5 years later she finally stopped hoping and dreaming that he would because she came to the realization that he was never coming back, her feelings towards him changed as well as time passed the love turned to hate his arms were no longer a safe place. This man was only the start of pain her friendships were no better every best friend she’s ever had has also left her side, they stick around for a year or two that’s about it then they replace her and move on. Her first love was the second male that she trusted after the first left. He seemed like the perfect guy for her someone who would make her believe that there was such thing as love but she was wrong he was the last reason she needed to prove to herself that the concept of love did not exist. This girl has gone from daddy’s little girl to a quiet lonely person who has trust issues and is scared of not only the world but also in herself. She knows that as years go on there is more heartache and more pain to come. Her heart will keep on breaking but for now and years to come she’ll be strong and keep standing by herself to move on with her life and maybe just maybe let someone into her life to find the happiness she once had at the age of five.
And Her Heart Keeps Breaking
January 27, 2012