My Blood Temperature Raises

February 17, 2008
By Jasmine Gullison, Morden, ME

My blood temperature raises to about 150 as I look into those blue gazing eyes. Deep brown hair and a beautiful clear complexion I cannot help but stare

He cannot see me. We have never talked, and for now, I dont plan to. For now i'm only wishing he knew who I was.

I hear thngsabout him that is hard to believe. I hear how his hobbies are painting the city hall walls or trying to not sett off the beeper at the mall. He is a bad boy.

I wonder what thrill he finds in such, and if he likes being a rebel. I think back to the day when I seen his hands unfree, unable to steal or vandalize property, he was handcuffed. I know what he does is wrong but i still love him. I think about the feelings of anxiety and thrill he gets and sometimes, I wish I was there, I want that feeling of not getting caught, the feling of momentarily freedomness. The fantasy I get sometmes lasts so long I forget what I was doing. He is always running in my mind, He makes it hard to think. I ask myself each day why it has to be him, why it has to be him I am falling for, falling for so hard. Why on earth do I feel such a strong sensation for a boy who I know I shouldnt be with? I truly believe everything happens for a reason, and I pray for him. I pray for him to change so he can become a part of me. I know deep down inside he has a good side to him, and a caring heart. I know he wants to change, and his mistakes are what he is learning from. I pray he becomes a man, because I know what he is doing is all fun and games, it's meaningless. But i still love him

I Sit here not even a meter away, staring at him, studying his features one by one, and wish I could tell him how I feel. I want to tell him he has painted inside me a feeling I have never once had. He has given me the one feeling ive always wanted to feel. He has shown me someone I know ill never want to be, but most of all he has given me the chance to help him. His crying soul is asking for help, he wants to change and he wants to be a good person. I want to be that person to give him help, to let him know that just because he has done wrong, he is still cared for. Its not the bad side that gave me these feelings, but his determination and will to change.

3 days passed and we have talked. I have never spoke such words, nor heard such. I have never had eye contact like I did today. Most of all I have never felt so touched. He likes me because he knows I care, and i have never been happier about me opening up my mouth. I spoke what I knew I needed to say, without being concerned what the outcome might of been. I just knew it was the best thing to do.

This whole time i was right. He did have a good side, like every single human being. That good part of him lies deep in my heart regardless of what gave him shame in anyway, and the past that no longr matters.

I seen an amazing person underneath all those mistakes.

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