PART 1
‘Yet another day in my wonderful life, snore.’ I thought. I got up, walked over to the corner and did my best to grimace. Me being a dog, it goes unsaid that this didn’t look grimace like. I was attempting to grimace at my food. My “Owner” had put pumpkin chunks in my food again, ruining a perfectly good meal. Try mixing the inside of a pumpkin with mushed up meatloaf. I shiver just thinking about it. My “Owner” thinks that I need help with my digestion. I’m not fiberless, I’m just getting old.

Let’s just say I purged my stomach on the ruined meal and walked through the slightly open door. ‘Good, nobody’s up. I can blame the mess on the husband. Uh-oh, here’s the husband.’ I thought. This large, annoyed creature had just appeared in front of my door. I quickly ran to the living room and hid behind the couch. I heard the husband cleaning up my mess and putting many obscenities before my name in a fashion I do not feel comfortable repeating.


After doing this until 5:30 he put a note on the fridge and left. I winced as I read the note. I can only say that he wasn’t happy. I knew I had to get that note before my “Owner” saw it or I was dead. I then remembered that I’m one foot tall and fifteen pounds. Hey, I’m a Boston Terrier, give me a break.

Then I looked around and noticed that the fridge was across from the granite counter top with the stove in it. I had to go up on the chairs, get onto the slippery counter, avoid the stove, jump off said counter and get and eat the note! I saw a chair next to the counter and jumped onto it, then jumped onto the counter. I then promptly slid off the other side. It’s not well known that my family prides itself for always landing on its feet. It’s even less well known that we never do. But I’m better at landing that my mom, so I did well and landed upside down. It soon became a cycle; Chair, counter, slide, fall, chair, counter, slide, fall, chair, counter, slide, fall. Knowing that doing this all day wouldn’t help much but wanting to try it once more I heard my “Master” coming.