"My, Oh My..."

December 17, 2007
“My, oh my, that golden watch you’re wearing certainly is scrumdidiliumptious,” Willy said to the man next to him in the elevator.

“Wha- oh. This? Yeah, it’s bran’ new. Just got it. Rolex, baby, is’ all about the Rolex. Man I promise, I'm so self conscious, that's why you always see me with at least one of my watches.” Kanye studied the man and his unusual attire. He was donning a bright purple suit and a matching top hat. He slowly twirled a black cane between his fingers.

“Rolex- oh, yes, indeed. Mine’s made of hard candies.” He smiled down at the pastel sweets that created the wristband of watch. Willy looked on as thousands of stars shot past the elevator. Willy decided his purchase of a great glass elevator was a good one, perhaps even better than the candy factory.

“So-uh, you lookin’ familiar. I know you?” Kanye said.

“You should never doubt what no one is sure about.” Willy continued to study the landscape outside the elevator. The elevator came to a sudden halt. Just as soon as it stopped, it plunged downward, to left, diagonally to the right, and to the left again.

“’Dis is the craziest elevator I eva’ been in,” Kanye said. Kanye became more and more curious about his fellow passenger. “So- uh- what’s you’ name?”

“Willy. Willy Wonka.” He smiled a devious smile. The elevator came to an abrupt stop. A man stepped in. He had brown shaggy hair and an olive green shirt on. He hadn’t shaved in days. “Like, what’s up fellas? The name’s Shaggy, or Shag for short.”
Kanye and Willy shared matching looks of disgust. As soon as the elevator started up again, it came to an abrupt halt.
“Like, what’s going on?” Shaggy said.
No one answered.
Willy looked at Kanye and down at the sparkling watch on his wrist. He began to feel a tingling in his fingers, like when he was bitten by an Oompa Loompa. The watch’s sparkle reflected in all six window panes of the elevator. He moved his gloved hand towards the sleeve of the notorious rapper.
Kanye remained in a bored trance, listening to Shaggy go on about his dog and his van. He slipped one of his fingers between the wristband and Kanye’s wrist; he was fractions of an inch from touching Kanye’s skin.

“Oh look! An oompa loompa is waving at as!” Willy said. He pointed out the window behind them.
Kanye and Shaggy looked out the window. Willy seized the opportunity to grab the watch and slip it off, without the gold even touching Kanye’s hand. Willy quickly admired the watch.

“Like, there’s no Oompa Loompa out there!” Shaggy said.

“Yeah!” Kanye said. He rubbed his wrist where the watch just was. “I swar’ I was wearing a watch befo’.” he scratched his head. “Didn’t you tell me you liked it?”
Willy hit the button closest to him, then remembering they were already at a standstill.

“Well, it has been a lovely evening. I shall see you two at a later date.” Willy tipped his hat to the remaining men in the elevator and exited the flying machine.

“Man, I gotst to find my watch!”

“Have no fear, the Shagster is on the case!” Shaggy said, filled with hope that he may finally get to solve a mystery on his own.

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