Alice Andrews' sweet, caramel revenge

October 14, 2007
By Sarah Thurman, Vancouver, WA

Jane Jackson, St. Peter Jr. High’s own prankster queen. No one would ever try to cross this tall, bright and beautiful girl unless they really wanted to die a horrible, social death. When you did have the unlucky chance of making her mad you would seriously consider moving to Alaska and changing your name. But we all know that no parent is that cool and would never move from sunny California to cold and snowy Alaska. All through junior high Jane tormented kids and they would go to counseling for a very, very long time. All was right in Jane’s world until the new girl came to school. It was perfect. Alice Andrews was a freak in the eyes of both of Jane’s friends and they could just barely begin to imagine the horror this girl would go through in her year at the school. Alice was one of those kids going through a “black” phase. She wore black lipstick, black eye liner and her hair was naturally black. She was the perfect target.

As Alice’s first week came to an end Jane had a plan to make this the worst day of her life. She had piled water balloons into Alice’s locker and had a video camera all ready to catch the little freak on tape getting soaked. As Jane waited just down the hall from Alice’s locker, waiting with her little video camera and her pride, she didn’t notice another trap set just for her. The ceilings in the school all had pipes running straight down the middle and this was the perfect setting for Alice’s own trap. She had put oatmeal into a bucket, hung it from the pipes, attached a rope and was waiting – just like Jane – for the perfect moment to strike. Jane’s two friends, Meagan Harper and Claire Johnson, came wandering around the corner. Luckily they didn’t see Alice who was hiding in the shadows.

“Like, where is the little weird-o?” Meagan said in her high pitched voice. Jane glanced over at her friend and smiled.

“If I knew, I would tell you.” Jane said the sentence sort of slowly as if Meagan needed a minute to catch up with what she was saying. Alice looked up at the bucket and smiled. Perfect, three birds with one stone. She tightened her grip on the rope and tugged it a little. As Jane turned back to watch Alice’s locker a teacher came around the corner. He said good afternoon to Jane and her friends and then walked down another of the halls. This was the moment. Alice yanked the rope and the oatmeal poured down like a waterfall of oatmeal goodness.

Jane screamed as the creamy substance collided with her head and Meagan and Claire did the same. Their blonde hair was now a sand color because the oatmeal was cinnamon and it had a naturally brown color. Alice came striding out of the shadows smiling her biggest, happiest smile.

“Well, that was defiantly worth the wait.” She giggled as she passed the trio. She wandered down to her locker and opened it. Alice had no idea about the trap that had been set for her. The water balloons came cascading out and her mouth fell open in a silent scream. Jane began to giggle and then her giggle turned into a laugh and her clones started laughing with her. Alice glowered over at the oatmeal covered group and made a screeching noise through her teeth. Students came round the corners of the hall and stopped to stare at the scene in front of them. There was the new girl soaked from head to toe and then there was Jane and her friends covered in oatmeal. Jane looked at all the students starring at them and then made a whistle type noise. The students quickly turned and ran as fast as they could out of the battle field.

“This is not over.” Jane shouted at Alice. Alice just nodded her head.

“Bring it on.” She said back her voice full of scorn. Jane just starred at her for a while before stomping off down the hall followed by Claire and Meagan who were trying to calm her down. Alice turned to close her locker and said to herself, “This could be fun.” She slammed the locker closed and walked home in her soaking clothes.

The next week started with Alice going to her locker. When she reached out to open it and electric shock went through her hand and her hair stood on end. Alice could her Jane and her friends laughing from around the corner. Alice smiled as she thought about what she could do to Jane to make her feel humiliated. So at lunch she went outside, dug a hole, grabbed some worms and went back inside making sure that Jane didn’t see her put the worms in her sandwich. Jane bit into the sandwich and started joking on the still living creatures. Alice watched with a feeling of satisfaction.

Later that night she told her parents about the worms and her father rolled his eyes.

“Alice have you ever heard the saying, ‘An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind’?” Alice had heard this saying, many times in fact. Didn’t mean she was going to listen to it. That night in the safety of her room she planned her next attack on the evil Jane. She would need honey and some feathers from the art department. She filled three balloons with honey and backed them safely in her bag.

The next morning she went down to the art department and grabbed a bag of feathers. She waited outside Jane’s first classroom and when she finally came out Alice was ready. She threw the balloons and watched as the honey clung to Jane’s clothes. She then threw the feathers which stuck to the honey and made Jane look like a giant chicken. Alice would soon find out the Jane had been prepared just like her. Jane had put a bird in Alice’s locker and when she opened the locker the bird came flying out at her scarring her half to death. At that moment she knew exactly what she would do the next day. Little did she know that Jane was thinking the exact same thing, guess great minds really do think alike.

The next day Alice came to school where she went straight to the kitchen to grab a huge vat of caramel. Jane got to school and almost followed Alice there. In the darkness of the kitchen Alice and Jane wandered looking for the light switch. Alice found it just seconds before Jane and when Jane’s hand touched Alice’s the whole world fell apart. Alice grabbed a spatula that had been in the caramel and flung it at Jane. Jane found the vat and poured it on Alice. The commotion drew the attention of the teachers and the principal. When the principal finally reached the kitchen Alice and Jane were practically strangling each other in the dark. Both were covered in caramel and could barely stand. They sat there starring up at the principal, both wondering what their fate would be.

“I hate it when my dad’s right.” Alice whispered glaring over at Jane.

“What do you mean?” she asked.

“If you fight fire with fire all you get is burned.” The principal smiled and then nodded.

“Say hello to the burn part.” He said as he helped the two girls up. After they were discovered they both had kitchen duty for a month, three days of suspension and Alice made a new friend. Even though they didn’t seem like they would make good friends in the beginning, Alice and Jane are now inseparable and enjoy playing smaller jokes on each other. In the end it was another happily ever after.

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