And You Think Too Much

April 25, 2008
By Brooke Christeson, Park City, UT

And you think too much, I say.
Well, I think too much, I say.
I think to much, to never have anything to say.

Funny sounding, you say?
Aha! I agree.

There's no getting to know me, just know, I'll never know myself. I change my mind before I figure it out. I know what I want but I know I don't want to want it. I misuse self denial as my discipline. I keep myself in check in order to be an all around people pleaser. I don't form opinions on things I don't feel the need to, and my teachers may not ever understand that. You may never understand that. One of these days, just one of them, I would like to really share what's on my mind. I don't want to be a disappointment. But what can you do. You can only be content. All these beliefs are ruining me.

"And how do you know you're not just a figment of someone's imagination? How do you know this isn't really but someone's dream? That you never lived this day, that this never really happened, and how do you know the here and the now is really here and now, not there and then? What if, this all never happened at all and it's all simply something someone made up in their mind, and to us, this masterpiece of a planned out word is nothing more then chemical reactions? Oh how lonely it all seems now. Good day, smoke and skin, imagine more."

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