Don't say a word

March 5, 2008
By vianey ramirez, Apopka, FL

I could feel the blood going cold in my veins, the adrenaline pumping and my legs hitting the pavement at a fast, frantic pace.

It was all much easier before, never would have I gone through all this if she had been here. Her, of course, my mom. The day she left was the most painful thing I’ve gone through-definitely much more pain, then my father could ever do onto me.

I would be lying if I told you that day was like every other- my mom busying herself around the house, me just coming home from a long day at school, and dad at work. It was a much more different scenario- I was locked away in my room-locked away from all the screaming and violence downstairs.

However, I couldn’t ignore the last words that came out of my mom’s mouth.

“I’m sick and tired of your drinking, I’m out of can keep Lorraine.” She paused. ”Lets see who needs who.”,my mother yelled slamming the front door.

“Fine!...leave like you always do.”,my father yelled seconds after the door shut close.

Immediately, I ran downstairs.

“Dad what’s going on?”,I asked looking at my father , who’s face was red like a tomato. He slowly turned to look at me, hesitating.

“You look just like your useless mother.”,My dad said. And with that, he hit me so hard, that I passed out in less than five seconds. That was the last time I saw my mother.

No, I thought to myself; still running. I have to get keep running- from my dad and these terrible memories.

I willed my feet to go on, but my feet and legs were aching. And my lungs were burning in my chest- screaming for me to stop and get some oxygen.

With the little strength and hope I had, I managed to turn the corner on Magnolia street. This was new territory for me, I had never been out this far from town before.

Everything was still and dark. Not one house had it’s lights on, except for one on the end of the street. It was big, and all the lights inside were on.

Without thinking about it for another second, I went straight ahead-towards it.

By this point, I was soaking wet-everything clung to my body, and my jeans felt like it weighed ten pounds from all the water it soaked up.

When I finally reached the steps, that lead to the front of the house, I stood on the welcome mat, embodied with pink flowers.

My hands was inches away from the door, when I stop to think twice about what I was about to do. I couldn’t just barge in to a strangers’ house and beg them for help, especially this late at night- it was 11:15, when I ran from my house. But what was I to do? I had no where to go and no one to talk to. I had to do this, or else I’ll be sleeping on the ground. In the cold, hard rain...

Closing my eyes and biting my bottom lip, I knocked on the door. Just after a couple of seconds, a lovely voice came from the door-it sounded like a lady..

Slowly opening the door, she stuck her head out to see who it possibly was this late at night.

“Do you need any help?”, the woman asked with a wide grin on her face.

“Um, actually I do”, I said, my voice coming out smaller than I intended it to be.

I turned around, briefly, to see if my father had followed me here.

Apparently, he didn’t because there was no one in sight.

“What is it darling? Are you okay? What are you doing here this late at night? Look at you, your soaking wet.”, my head was starting to spin from all the questions she was asking.

The woman must have noticed because she quickly said, “Oh I’m sorry, honey. I’m just surpised that a beautiful, young lady such as yourself, is here this late at night.”.
"Look, I’m really sorry if I’m bothering you, I know it’s really late, but my father is after me. I ran away from home, and I don't have a place to go". The words barely come out of my lips. And a lot of sweat was trickling down my head, it was strange considering that it was too cold for me to be burning hot. It must have been the adrenaline taking control of my body.

The woman stared at me in dismay, but after a few seconds she held my hands in hers and pulled me inside her house. Inside, it was lovely, but I didn't concentrate much on the decorations of the house, I was too worried.

"Honey who’s at the door", came a man’s voice from behind the stairs.

"Ben, sweetheart can you come over here, it's important", the lady answered.

"Be right there", he called back.

I was getting sick, and dizzy, all of this was hitting me so fast. I stood motionlessly against the wall in front of me. I felt far away from my thoughts and from the voices behind me. Everything became a big blur. I didn't know what was going on with me but, I felt as if someone was taking me away to a another world. I didn't wanted to go, only it felt so peaceful.

"Hey, honey wake up". The voice of an angel said tapping my shoulder.

"Mom, don't go, why did you leave me?", I murmured still with my eyes close.

"shhh”, she whispered.

"I still love you, mom. Even if you don’t".

"Don't worry honey, I’m here.", the same voice from the angel said, all while putting a warm blanket on my shoulders.

I closed my eyes and unconsciously slipped back to sleep; I went to this magical place where everything was bright and peaceful. I was floating around in my magical place. When the sun of reality hit me in the eyes and made me wake up from my dreamland.

As I stood up from the bed and I realize that I was not in the house, I used to called home. Even so, this place was so much better. It was a fairly large bedroom, with trophies surrounding every light blue wall in it

Getting a gold trophy was something that I always dreamed to have in my room. I had joined the swim team, a while back-when my mother was still with me. But I never got a chance to compete, after my mom left-I quit. Swimming was something we had in common and it didn’t feel right if she wasn’t there to cheer me on.

Hoping the kind family who took me in wouldn’t mind, I went to the closet and found me some clothes. It was mostly sports team outfits- there was one for almost every sport: basketball, soccer, softball, lacrosse-even cheerleading. Not wanting to get them dirty, I went for a plain large, white shirt and some shorts. Both had the number 77 on them. This didn’t seem as important as some of the rest. I really hope they don’t mind.

Shutting close the closet door, I headed to a different door in front of me. I opened it and I found myself in a hallway, as I walk without knowing where to go, I hit myself with a guy who was getting out of a room. I was shocked. The guy was bare chested and he was only wearing green boxers with blue stripes. He was tall and with a ponytail. The light tan color of his skin matched the perfect color of his cold blue eyes and his hair was golden.

"I, I...”

"what are you doing here?",he asked folding his hands on his chest.

"I, I...”

He stared at me in surprise as well.

Had I known that he lived here, never would I have slept-or even come near this house. I recognized the boy in front me as Michel Brown-Mike, for short. This boy and his brother Nicholas Brown or Nick has been tormenting me since kindergarten, when I accidently took Mikes glue. Thinking it was mine.

“What? is the whittle baby too scared to talk?, he asked with a threatening voice, and raising one eyebrow.

I turned and I walked away from him. Like I always did when faced against Mike.

With the clothes in my hands, I went into the same room I had slept in. And I shut the door behind me. While I was resting myself against the door, a really loud bang interrupted my thoughts.

I jumped up.

Then Mike spoke, “You better open that door-

“Mike, what are you doing? what’s wrong with you?”, a different voice asked . That had to be Mikes brother Nick, I’d recognized his voice anywhere.

“Do you know who is here?”, Mike asked the other person in a whisper.

“Mmm..Nope. Who?”

“That girl we bother at school, remember?”, Mike said angrily.

“Give her a break Mike”.

“Nick, what the hell are you saying?”.

Then I heard footsteps leaving and noises stopped, so I decided to open the door. And try to make it to the bathroom again.

While I was on my way to the bathroom, I heard not-so-quiet whispers coming from the next room, I knew it was Nick and his evil brother, Mike. Nick was never as mean to me as Mike has always been. I stood in front of the closed door for a few seconds, listening to their conversation.

“Nick, I’m sick and tired of mother helping every person she finds on her way”, Mike yelled angrily.

“But, Mike why are you been so hard, if she’s staying here-something, obviously, wrong must have happened. Aren’t you the least bit concerned?”

“Oh, don’t start with that”.

“I don’t know, just leave the girl alone”

“Do you even have any idea of who she is?”

“Not really, but I saw her last night. Dad told me he needed a hand, so I helped carry the girl to Ashley’s room”.
“You did what?”, mike yelled again.
“Didn’t you hear? I said I helped get the girl to get to Ashley’s room”. Nick repeated again.
“You know what? That’s it!”.
“Where are you going?”
“I’m gonna get that b-
“You better stop right there.”, Nick said, not letting mike finish his sentence.

Upon hearing this, I immediately went to the bathroom and I shut the door slowly. Making sure to lock it, and sitting on the toilet. I don’t know what to do.

Outside of this bathroom lies an animal, who wants to beat the heck out of me. And the same goes for outside the house as well. Only, this time I couldn’t figure who is worse. My dad or Mike. I took a look at myself in the square-shaped mirror. I was pale like never before. My beautiful gray eyes, now all red and puffy, and my nose red and dripping. Examining my face closer, I found a big bruise in left side of my cheek- all purple and green. My hair was a matted mess, and I had dirt smudged across my face.

I couldn’t bare looking at myself anymore. A few weeks ago, I was so happy. And now as I cried with both of my hands on my face, I couldn’t help feeling more down then ever. I just wish this was a nightmare and that I will wake up soon. My mom at my side, ready to hug and kiss me. Like she used to do every time, I had nightmares.

Only this time I knew for a fact that this was reality, and not some silly nightmare with childish monsters. I also knew that my mom will never come. And this made me cry again.

There was a soft knock at the door, followed by a voice, “Honey, is everything alright in there?”

I sighed. Ignoring the question.
I took a look to myself in the mirror again trying to stop the tears from going down from my eyes. But it was useless as much as I tried to tell my brain to stop crying it was coming more harder.
“Sweetheart, are you all right? The sweet voice of the lady asked again.
I turned on the sink and I clean up my face very carefully; it hurt to much the big bruise that cover one of my cheeks.

“Yes, I’m fine”. I lied.

I turn off the sink. And I clean my face with the bottom of my shirt, and I opened the door from the bathroom so the lady could see that I was fine.
She looked at me with a big smile in her face.
She was wearing a blue long skirt and a baby pink sweater. And in both of her hands cloth.
I was looking at her flat, my eyes never leaving hers. i was far away from my own tought but I was still looking at her, this time her mouth moving softly, but my ears were disconnected from my brain i was just emotionless watching her, i couldn't hear her velvet sweet voice i was just lost in my own thoughts.
Its hard the life I’m living. I don’t wish this to anybody. It’s like living in your own nightmares with no angels or light at the end....there pain everywhere and it hurts to not know what do or think it is like I’m dying slowly with no one to cater for me. How can I forget everything....I want a new brain, a new family and also a new life. I don’t deserve what I’m leaving, I too weak.

Thinking to my owns thought I realize that everything that I desire was in front of my face. The face of angel and the new family that I always wanted. But however, there is another monster in every corner of my life. And this Mike. Even if I wanted to stay here, he is the one who is goin to react just like my father.
“Hon, are you okay?
Her sweet velvet voice interrupted my thoughts. Blinking my eyes twice, I looked at her.
“I’m sorry...
“don’t be what about if you take a shower and meet us for breakfast downstairs, everybody is waiting impatient to meet you”.
I glance a sour looked to her. I bet the only reason Mike was so eager to meet me was to put his big hands on my neck and brake it in thousands of pieces; the woman smile again. She most have notice the terrifying look in my face.
“Don’t worry hon, they don’t bite”.
“You are so nice to me, I’m so glad that I nock your door and you let me enter even though I’m a totally stranger to you, I’m very thankful for your kindness”. I said almost whispering. I didn’t have that much of energy. Like I said before I’m too weak.
“Oh, sweetheart that is so sweet of you, I’m really glad that open the door of my house to you, it’s so nice to have someone who really appreciate my kindness”. The lady said giving me a hug, not bothering to get dirty with my poorly cloth still wet.
“Here take this...I ‘ll meet you downstairs”. She hand me the cloth that she was hugging.
“Oh, I took some cloth from the closet in the room...but I’m really sorry I’ll put them back”. I said turning to look for the cloths I left on the top of the toilet.
“Er, no, that’s okay, you can wear that...I’ll put this one in the room, if you need extra cloth feel free to wear the ones that era hanging in the closet” she said taking the cloth from my hands again.
I nodded closing the door.
I turn on the shower and it took me a couple of seconds to put the temperature warm. I took off my cloth and I got in the shower. It was what I needed. Water cleaning the dirt of my body and the relieving the pain from my heart. It past a couple of minutes and I was finally set. But there was a little problem, the short were to short for me, the fit me, but not the right way. I don’t think Mrs...would not be please if go downstairs like this. So I have to change right away. I open the door from the bath room and I accidently nock myself with something.
“Aaauusshh”. One complaint.
“I’m sorry”. I said looking up to see who it was.
I'm sorry" I replied again.
" it's okay".
I turned around and I walked away, but still felt his eyes wide open on me.
I rush myself to the room and I locked the door resting behind it. I can not believe that I hit myself with NICK!. However, I found the cloth that Kate gave me on the bed and I change the shorts for a descent blue jean. it was a little big. but it fit me.
when I got downstairs Kate was putting the breads on the table. in fact everybody was there waiting to eat. maybe they are waiting for me. anyway Kate found a sit next to her husband and I guess the my sit is next to Mike!. this most be a nightmare. Lorraine wake up, wake up!.
"oh, hey hon, c'mom and enjoy us for breakfast...sit next to Michael". Mrs. Brown said with a grin on her face.
oh, she really wants me dead; I looked at Mike and he gave me a terrefain look. I sallow hardly. anyways, I move on and I sat next my worst enemy.
"I like better the other shorts". Nick snapped across the table. the embarrassment surround me, and I wanted that the grown take over my place. I blush and I hoped with all my heart to disappear from this house. I can't believe that this is happening to me.
"hey, kid, why don't you pray for breakfast?" Mr. Brown said looking at me direct in the eyes.
I looked down. what am I suppose to say. I close my eyes and I put my hands together. but the words didn't came out.
"Jesus, bless this food and the person who did it, in the name of the farther, son, and the holy spirit, amen". that was nick who saved my butt.
"i thought dad said that it was this...
"Mike!". Mrs. Brown snapped.
"you know what, I'm not hungry anymore". he paused looking at me. "I lost my appreciate". Mike said standing up from the table and walking away.
"please, forgive him, he is like that sometimes....with a rude temper". Mrs. Brown said with a half smile.
"okay, so why don't you tell us what happen last night". Mr. Brown said cutting the eggs in half.
I took a deep breath. closing mis eyes.
how can I tell them that my father is an aggressive drunk? I open my eyes and everybody was staring at me, even Nick. that was a surprise. I took a deep breath again and I look at Mrs. Brown.
"everything happen sense my felt...she couldn't take my father addictions for the beer and his yelling, so one day she couldn't take it anymore so she walked away leaving everything behind, even me, sense that day my father new target was I had it to something, I just couldn't let him hit me for no reason...well there was a reason but it was kind of stupid. he used to tell me that I look just like my sick useless mother-
"oh, my". Mrs. Brown said with a surprise looked.
"let her finish mom". Nick snapped.
I sight.
"last night my father was drunk and he was yelling my moms name, so before he hits me I run away from my bedroom window, he saw me so he ran after me, still screaming my moms name, I run as fast as I could to not be chance by my terrible father.....and that is how I got here". I said with my eyes watering as I remember that nightmare.
"oh, hon, don't worry you can stay here as long as you feel safe". Mr. brown said giving me support in his eyes.
I gave him a half smile.

When I look at Nick his mouth was wide open. He was staring at me so different than before. I couldn’t figure out if It was in a good way or in a bad way, but I move on looking at Mrs. Brown who was looking at me with her eyes watering. She is to sensitive.
“I, I don’t know what to say”. Mrs. Brown said wiping tears that were goin down from her eyes.
“Don’t say anything”. Nick snapped, looking at me with the same looked that he had I few seconds ago.
“Nick, don’t talk like that to your mother”. Mr. Brown said giving a terrible look to Nick.
Nick hesitate, whispering at last “sorry mom”.
“that’s fine sweety, I know you are surprise too”. Mrs. Brown said giving a half smile to her son.
Suddenly, Mike appear with a cup on his hand, everybody stare at him even me. He looked at everyone, even at me.
“What? I can’t have a class of juice?”. he snapped cutting his eyes on me.
“Cut it out, Mike”. Mr. Brown demanded hitting the table with his hands and standing up as the same time.
Mike move on ignoring his father, opening the refrigerator door. He stood there for while.
“Now don’t tell me she drank the whole bottle of juice!”. mike yelled slamming the refrigerator door
“that’s it mike, why are you been so a winy baby!”. Nick demanded standing up from the table and walking to his brother.
I was surprise, I did expect those words from Mr. Brown but never from, Nick.
“What are you her guardian angel, now? Mike yelled giving an evil looked to his own brother.
Nick kept silence.
“Michael Brown you are grounded!”. Mr. Brown demanded pointing his index finger at him.
“Great that’s what I needed!”. mike snapped been sarcastic.
“To your room!, now!”. Mike’s father demanded again but this time pointing his index finger to the stairs.
“But, dad I have football practice today”. Mike complains walking strait to the stairs.
“You should it think about that before you acted like a reject”. Nick yelled across the table, folding his hands on his chest.
“Nick!, do you wanna be next”. Mr. Brown yelled letting angriness rise up to a level that his face was turning red.
Nick shook his face, walking back to the table and sitting down. He looked at me for a second and then at his plate. I still couldn’t figure out if his glare was for good or for bad.
“Can I go to the room? I asked looking at Mrs. Brown.
Immediately, Mrs. Brown put her fork and knife resting on the corner of the square shape plate.
“But, honey you haven’t even started to eat”. She said in a calm velvet voice.
“I’m not really that hungry”. I said almost whispering.
She sight.
“If is because of mike, don’t worry hi is like that sometimes”. Nick said putting some eggs on his mouth.
“It’s is not because of that”. I lied.
He looked at me direct in my eyes. I bet he could tell that I was lying. I’m a horrible layer.
I blush. I just wanted to get out of that scenario, and be in a place that I just could be me and not worry little winy baby.
“Fine, but if you need anything don’t be scare to ask, we are going to be more than happy to help, Isn’t that right James?”. Mrs. Brown said holding her husband hand.
He smile at her.
“Hundred percent right”.

I nodded trying to fake a smile. But I just couldn’t. Anyways I got up and ran up to the second floor. I tried to remember which door was mine, but I couldn’t remember which was mine, so I open the one I saw first two feet away from. That was not the room, it was totally the oppositive from Ashelys room. The walls were painted white with black and white paintings. Also there was a lovely balcony. The room was neat and clean. In fact, I have no clue who this room belongs to. I close the door again, and next to it was another door, I open it again.

That was the right door, it was the same room with trhopys every where. I close the door, and I walked to the bed in front be continued

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