Dear Dad | Teen Ink

Dear Dad

March 23, 2011
By Anonymous

Dear dad,


Hello. My name is Annabel King, and I am your daughter. My mother is Isabella King. I am 17 years old, which means that exactly 17 years ago you left my mother. Maybe you might not care about me or my mother, but I decided that I would let you know a little about my life. So here it is.

Have you ever heard people say that people are different, that’s what makes them unique? That each one should stand out and do their own thing. It might be true, but do they realize that sometimes is it so hard to stand out? In high school especially, teens do many things, just to “fit in.” Fitting in is easier than standing out.

I am now a junior in high school, and when I think back to when I was in elementary school, I realize that my idea of my high school life is nothing like my reality. I imagined that high school was going to be the climax of my teenage life. Yeah, well I think that didn’t really come true. High school life meant new friends, new experiences, and new classes. I thought that all these would combine to allow me to grow. I did grow, however not in the way that I expected.

I entered the school year confident of myself, but soon that would all change. I soon discovered that most teenagers didn’t care about who people were on the inside. They only cared about what seemed to be on the outside. Most of the girls in my high school were as thin as a toothpick, dressed well, wore makeup, and had boyfriends. I, on the other hand, was chunky, never wore makeup, didn’t have expensive clothes, and didn’t have a boyfriend. I thought that the only thing that mattered was the inside of a person, but I guess I was wrong, again. My classmates seem to avoid me, never talk to me, and whisper about me when I passed them by. Those were the things that hurt me. And it seemed that they did it on purpose. I mean if they were going to talk about me, they could at least do it when I can’t hear them, right? Things that I can’t see or hear can’t really hurt me. That when on for my first two years.

When I entered my junior year, I started to have a different view of the world. My mother had just been diagnosed with cancer. That meant so many things: it meant not only that my mother could die, but also that I could lose my best friend. It also means that I will lose everything I have. Since you left my mom when you found out about me, I only having her to count on. I have to admit though, that even if I never say it, I have missed have a father by my side. It’s like in school, not having a study guide for test. You can still get a good grade, but having the study guide increases the chances to get a good grade. Having a father by my side to share my pain. A father that would offer a shoulder that I could cry on. That could help me cope with the idea that I could lose my mother.

It seemed that it didn’t matter anymore that people talked about me, that I had few friends, or that I didn’t have a boyfriend. It is interesting that when the most important thing to you is in danger, the things that you once thought important now begin fading into the background.

When I found out that my mother had cancer, I started looking for a job. I found a job as a waitress in a restaurant. I go to school in the mornings, and then I go to work. The money I earn allows us to pay the expenses of the house. Before getting diagnosed, my mother was a happy woman. Her eyes were full of emotion . Now all I see in her eyes is pain. I take her to the hospital for chemotherapy, and I drive her back home. I witness the pain it causes her. She did not want to eat, had trouble going to the bathroom, and everyday she would vomit. The chemotherapy was like a being in a hurricane daily. It would take out all the strength she had. She would become so exhausted that she would pass out in the car. These are the moments that I wish that you were here. Having someone that could share my pain. I have to take care of my mother, keep the house clean, and do well in school. I have to manage my time wisely.

My world has begun to revolve around my mother. Seeing my mother get up everyday and trying to overcome the cancer, gives me strengths to keep working with my problems. She is the reason that I wake up every morning and try to be a better person.

The school year is practically about to end. It is mid-April, and I want the school year to end. It is funny how you have the ability to change without actually knowing. My friends, the few that I have, have noted something that has changed in me. When I stopped and thought about it, I did change. When I walk the hallways, I don’t look down anymore. With confidence, I now look forward, looking at the students that pass by. You might be wondering where the confidence came from. Well, watching my mom struggle for her life, I realize that I had been worrying about things that didn’t really matter. I don’t care that I’m fat, and I don’t have a boyfriend, and I don’t even care that I don’t have many friends. The nights that I saw my mother suffer, and the nights that I couldn’t sleep, gave me the time to think about my life. I mean, I am almost a senior that will soon move on, and I need to know what I want out if life.

If you’re wondering, my mom survived the cancer, and from then on our lives have changed for the better. I now see that life is too precious to waste it on unnecessary things. I once had the idea of changing myself on the outside. But now I know it’s not necessary. Every time that I go outside and feel the wind in my face, I have a feeling that it’s whispering in my ear “everything that doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger.” Having confidence that you are becoming a better person is the best sensation after being in a storm.

I hope you actually read the letter. And if you are willing to meet your daughter, you now know where I live. I really hope to hear from you. It would mean a lot to me if I heard from you. I might not have had a dad before, but I’m looking forward to having a dad now. I have grown, but I still have many things to learn and maybe you are the one to teach me.














Sincerely yours,
Annabel King


The author's comments:
Girl trying to fit in in the world.

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