A Traviling Oyster | Teen Ink

A Traviling Oyster

February 4, 2011
By Masterbdg701 SILVER, Las Vegas, Nevada
Masterbdg701 SILVER, Las Vegas, Nevada
9 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
"We do not inherit the land from our ancestors, but borrow it from our children" part of an Indian song. "You get more of what you want with a gun and a kind word then with just a kind word." Al Capone

A traveling oyster (an old shelled mollusk with an old hat on his head) walks into a diner to order the cheese-steak with pimiento combo after hearing that it helps strengthen immunoglobins. This was important to the oyster because his immunoglobins were failing him after his wife left him and took all his pearls in the divorce. As the oyster waited for his meal, the waitress (a duck with an outfit that looks similar to a waitress from the 50s) handed him an old, rusty cup filled with water. The oyster (being a hygienic fellow) used his tongue to clean it off, when to his surprizement an old and colorful octopus (8 legged, funny hat, and had colors that changed often but always goofy) appeared in the chair in front of him. This happened so quickly and silently, that no one noticed but the oyster. The octopus told the oyster (while ordering his meal) that he was a magic genie and that he could grant the oyster one wish. When the oyster asked why only one wish, the genie told him that ever since WWII, they didn’t want to take any chances. For the next hour they talked and discussed their lives, when the genie’s order (9 chicken fingers) was presented to him. As the genie ate, the oyster starved. “Man, I wish my food was ready” said the oyster and at the end of his statement, the genie said “your wish is my command” and the waitress came out and presented the oyster’s meal. When the oyster looked up from his meal, he saw the genie scuttling away. This immunoglobulin B movie edition of an old joke has been presented by the Anorexia Nervosa Teens of America, wishing you safe travels to nowhere.

The author's comments:
This story is actually from a class assignment in which we had to pick 15 random words from the dictionary, then chose ten to make an epigraph (not included due to the fact this story is barely related) then a story from that. This story though is meant to follow joke format because of the "(name of something)walks into a bar" line.

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