Death Is My Happy Ending

February 1, 2011
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I’m going to tell you my painful story. The reason why I died, so you won’t make the same mistake and end up on death row, like I did. I’m giving you fare warning, you can’t trust anyone any more.

“Momma, Momma! I’m so sorry,” Leeann sprints through the door crying, and yelling. Our house was in the woods, our neighbors were the deer and trees. Other than that we had no neighbors, since our house was a mile or so out of town.

“Why are you sorry darling?” Mother speaks gently trying to calm Leeann down. Leeann was a spoiled girl even now she was spoiled at the age of 19.

“I have done something horrible, I have killed,” she admits quietly in a whisper. At this point I finally saw how spoiled she really was.

“Child, you did this? Why? How? Who,” My mother was no longer calm instead she was shocked. She started to back away. This made Leeann more uneasy, causing more tears to fall down her face, “Why,” mother asks quietly you could tell she was scared.

“He tried to…abduct me,” she pauses after the word to.

“Why didn’t you run from him,” I ask.

“He had me, it was a struggle to get away and once I was able to get away I made sure he wouldn’t try to get anyone again,” she explains carefully as if not telling the whole truth.

I should have noticed she was lying. I remember what happened next, she had convinced mother that she needed help and mother did help her. Mother still let her stay in the house. Even though Leeann had killed mother still showed her how much she loved her. Oh that made me furious, the fact that she came home crying and mother gave into her every whim.

“Do you know the consequences of killing somebody,” I ask her as we get ready for bed.

“I know, I know. The death penalty,” I watch the tears stream down her face and I begin to feel sorry for her.

The next day we heard knocking on our door. It was a crowd a mob even.

“No, no! They can’t find me,” Leeann says in spite of fear.

“Go,” I say trying to help my sister.

I open the door and the crowd stares me down I back away afraid for my life. My mother steps in front of me.

“Leave,” she says strongly. I start walking backwards then I turn and I run. I go to my room to find Leeann hiding in a corner.

“Get up, be stronger. Wipe your face,” I hear the mob yelling. They get closer and closer.

I still don’t know if they pushed mother out of the door way or if she stepped aside. I hope they pushed her out of the way so my effort to save my mothers favorite daughter wouldn’t have been a waist and I wouldn’t have died for nothing.

Leeann washed her face while I was thinking of a way to explain it was a mistake. They finally reach my room.

“Kill her, kill Leeann,” a person from the crowd yells.

“No,” I say backing up. I see Leeann crying I couldn’t leave her here, I reach the window. I put my hands up trying to tell them to stop. With one hard heavy breath I lie, “It was me, I killed him,” I take a quick glance at the mob, I see mother her expression torn and saying ‘no’. I elbow the window as hard as I can. Knocking out the glass I climb out and hear the roaring mob after me.

I remember running into the woods and hiding. Afraid, that I would meet death if I didn’t stay put. I think that’s when I realized I had to leave, and so I did. I didn’t go back to say goodbye to Leeann or mother I was sure somebody, that now hated me, was at my house. I didn’t go to William's house and say goodbye, I just left, and leaving him and everyone else I loved behind.

I was away for months. I was alone, with out any money, food or even extra clothes to wear. Sometimes I would get lucky and some kind hearted people would give me money but after a while they stopped. I had to go back or I would die of starvation or a simple cold.

When I got back relief struck me like a hurricane striking the coast.

Mother ran up to me, “Alice darling, I was afraid you were dead,” mother hugs me tightly not letting go.

“No, I left so I wouldn’t die,” I hug her tightly too.

“Well you must leave again I will make you food while you pack,” she goes towards the stove, and I go in my room. I pack a few clothes that I had here and all the money I could find. I enter the kitchen with all of my things. Mother gives me a small piece of bread that I begin to nibble on.

“You must hurry,” she says giving me money and two more pieces of bread. She kisses my forehead.

“I need to go to William's house.”

“There is no time you must go,” she rushes me in protection.

“I will come back,” I walk out of the door. I look ahead of me and I drop my belongings feeling beaten. Almost as if I lost the game. No keeps running through my head. No why did this have to happen? No! Please just let me go! No! I keep repeating it in my head until one slips out.

“No,” they heard me.

“You killed a soldier,” a man yells.

“My son,” a teary woman says quietly between sobs.

“No, no it wasn’t me,” I plead.

“Lies won’t help,” the same man yells.

“Leeann,” I say trying to prove it wasn’t me.

“Blaming your sister won’t help you now,” a different man tells me. He starts to walk up to me. I back up a step. He was just a foot away from me.

He was a short man still no shorter than me. He had a belly, not from eating too much but from drinking too much, but still was strong. His arms had defined muscles. His cotton shirt was small on his stomach but fit his arms. He walked up to me only six inches away from me now. Was this the end?

“You should be afraid,” he whispers to me. I back away from his words like I’m trying to dodge a bullet.

“I didn’t do it,” I sit on the ground, I begin to cry. The man grabs me by the wrists and pulls me up. I pull against him but he still drags me to the crowed.

“No, no, mother help me,” I scream for help but none comes. They take me to the court house and the sheriff takes me. He leads me to jail.

“Your court date will be tomorrow,” he tells me looking down at me out of pity and shame.

“I didn’t do it I swear to you,” I beg him to believe me.

“You can tell the judge that tomorrow,” he walks away from me.

“No, you have to believe me. You have to,” I want him to come back but he keeps walking, “I don’t even know how he died,” the man stops and turns around he walks toward me with an angered expression.

“You now he died,” he unlocks my cage opening the door. He steps in swiftly not giving me a chance to leave.

“I know he died but I don’t know how,” I try to prove my innocents.

“You know how you just won’t admit it. You lie like a fool,” he hits my cheek leaving it bright red with the outline of his hand. My eyes tear up and a piercing sob slips from my throat, “Shut up, you know how,” I wipe my face.

“How would you know if I did it anyway?”

“You admitted it.”

“When—that was for the safety of the person that did do it,” I remember carefully what happened.

“You can’t change your mind, you lie,” he leaves me and I sit in sorrow.

That night I only slept for minutes afraid that I would be killed in my sleep. The next day the sheriff came in and he took me to court at noon. I told the jury my story. When they asked me who really did it I replied, “I love them I wanted to protect them but doing so put me in harm. Now I realized that even though it’s too late. Just hear me out that I didn’t do it, but, but out of self defense Le…Leeann did.” They put Leeann on the stand.

“No, I didn’t do it. I was safe at home, when Alicen came running through the door crying.” I was now furious that Leeann would lie and put her sister in harm to protect herself.

“Lies! You tell nothing but lies, it was you! You came running through the door that night crying because you killed,” I stand up my eyes filled with tears.

“Sit down, Miss Crawford,” the judge says to me but I don’t listen.

“You all came to my mama’s house the next day lookin’ for Leeann. Not me but Leeann, see it was Leeann.”

The plaintiff comes and grabs me by the shoulders and forces me to sit down.

“You see, my sister here should get treated a little nicer at least for tellin’ the truth, give her at least something for doing that much. See if it wasn’t fer her you all would be killen’ the wrong person, so the killer would still be out there. Be kind enough fer what she did,” Leeann talks quickly so her southern accent comes out.

“How nice of your sister, even though you accuse her she doesn’t want you to die,” the judge says, “well it’s too bad I don’t see it like her. I see it as I just explained it.”

“You forgot to ask me two questions, who I supposedly killed and how I did it. ‘Cause I sure enough don’t know the answers to either one of them. And just how could I be the murder if I don’t know how I did it, or who I even killed.” This made my audience buzz with questions and conspiracies.

“You can lie about that can’t you, because you know sure as hell how you killed him. You know that it wasn’t self defense either. You willingly took a knife and stabbed him seventeen times, but by the third time he was already long dead.” The judge looks at me forcefully, trying to prove guilt.
This isn’t how it was supposed to be, the judge wasn’t supposed to say that or try and get me to react. She wasn’t pleased by my stunned reaction so she went on, “You knew in fact that it was the soldier Irving.”
“No I didn’t I swear to you. Why? Why would I kill? My life was perfect so why would I go off and ruin it by killing a man? I have always been the good child, the rebellious one was Leeann. I didn’t kill anyone.” I explain looking at Leeann she had a smug grin on her face.

I told my story the way it went but they still thought I was guilty. I would be locked up in jail for three days until I would be executed. I had to tell mother the verdict because she did not go she did not want to see either of her children be prosecuted for murder.
Each day William and mother visited me and each day I heard a crowed outside the window of my cell yelling, “Kill her now, kill her now.”

The day before my execution William was there the whole day and mother was there after noon. I cried to them, pleading to them to not let anyone kill me. He had the sheriff open my cell and he walked in. Then when mother came she held me like I was her new born child, out of protection. That day I cried like the time I broke my arm after the towns intimidator pushed me down for standing up for my friend. That day I broke my arm and I cried being only six I still fit in my mother’s lap. I felt just like a six year old being held. Once mother and William left the crowed soon followed and the night quickly began, leaving me only hours away from death.

I didn’t sleep at all that night. Mother came back and with William’s help carefully, and quietly broke me out of jail. I went back home to get my things and surprisingly enough William’s clothes were there too.

Before I could say goodbye to mother it became morning and with morning came Leeann.

Leeann gasped in shock, “Mother, what have you done? Alicen,” she says my full name instead of calling me Alice or Ali, “you’re out of jail,” Leeann was shocked but not in a good way.

“Are you not happy to see me,” I ask Leeann adding sarcasm so heavily it was like snow in Alaska.

“Mother they could give you the death penalty,” Leeann ignores me.

“I won’t let my innocent child be given the death penalty,” she looks at me, pleased with me. She stresses the word innocent.

“I practically saved your life and I don’t even get a thank you or a goodbye,” I grabbed my things in a rush knowing they would realize I was gone and they would look for me.

I had everything extra clothes, some food, and money, “Goodbye,” I say in a solemn tone. I walk out the door. With William I walk deeply into the woods. When I hear a stick break, it quickly makes me jump. I look at William he shakes his head no; startled I am not able to move.

Then I hear my mother yelling in a begging tone. I leave my things in the woods and I go back to the point where I can see the open area. I see all of the people that wanted me dead. I gasp in shock and quickly they realize I am there. The circle of people that hated me opened up so I got be in the middle of it. Not realizing that the man behind me wasn’t William I try to back into the not seen part of the woods but the man wouldn’t let me leave. So I turn and see that it’s not William but Leeann’s love; Henry. He shoved me in the middle of the circle.

I knew I wouldn’t get away this time. I still tried since I had nothing to lose. I back up until I hear an open roar in forest and then I feel a sharp piercing pain in my chest, on my heart. I fall to my knees and before my back hits the ground William catches me.

“You! You are a disgrace to this family,” mother yells. I look up at her furious face she was yelling at Leeann, “and you,” she turns to the crowed circling around us, “ you should all be ashamed! You have accused the innocent with no proof but a lie. You are all fools,” a tear roles down her face.

I cough and blood pools out of my mouth leaving me struggling for single breaths.

“Mother, I’m sorry,” I say in a weak voice.

“You shouldn’t be,” she hangs over me her quiet tears falling on my face.

I look at William, “I’m sorry,” I whisper. He only knew why I whispered and he only knew why I was sorry. I had told no one that he had asked me to marry him but that day I declined. That was the night I was at my mother’s house the night I found out Leeann had killed Irving.

“I will only love you,” he holds me tightly. Crying he lifts me up and brings me closer to his body he whispers in my ear, “please.”

“Yes,” I say with one last breath breathing in my own blood. He kisses my blood stained lips and with the strength I have I kiss back. With no more strength I give up, and the pain ends as I die.

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twilightfanatic said...
Mar. 5, 2011 at 11:59 am
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