Humanly Possible

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A puff of smoke appeared as Spongebob Squarepants and Patrick Star were staring at the clouds lackadaisically. A merman dressed in a tux approached them. “Congratulations!” he said in a game show-type voice, “ you have been chosen to receive any wish you can think of for one day!”

Spongebob and Patrick looked at each other gleefully.

“Any wish?” asked Spongebob.

“Anything,” replied the merman.

The two buddies both had so many things they wanted to do. Which wish should they choose? There was the switch bodies wish, the becoming a King Neptune, or becoming humans for a day. That’s it, Spongebob thought, humans for a day! When else are we going to be able to do this?

“Oh my gosh! Patrick do you know what this means?” questioned Spongebob.

“No…what?” replied Patrick.

“We can become humans! Just like we’ve always wanted! Well after the other two wishes.” gushed Spongebob.

“Oh yeah. I knew that!”

“Okay Mr. Merman sir, we have our wish,” said Spongebob excitedly, “we want to become humans!”

“Are you sure?” asked the merman.

“Yes! Yes! Yes!” screamed Spongebob and Patrick.

“Alright then, when I snap my fingers your wish will come true,” replied the merman mysteriously.

SNAP! With the snap of the merman’s fingers a swirly blue tornado appeared. The merman was gone and Spongebob and Patrick were running around like banshees. Saying goodbye to any and everything they could. The tornado got closer and closer and the two best friends held each other in a tight embrace. Then, with a whoosh as loud as a pin dropping, they were gone.

Spongebob woke up startled. Whoa, this isn’t Bikini Bottom. When he reached for the covers to get out of bed he was shocked to see two tan hands. Where am I? He jumped out of bed and went to a mirror. After walking across the room he realized that he was zapped into a hotel room. The walls were decorated in a beige print with few pictures. There was a desk in one corner and a television against the wall. In the bathroom there was a huge shower with a separate bathtub. It was well stocked with towels and other necessities. When he saw his reflection he was speechless. Instead of a square body, he had a long lean one. Spongebob’s legs were super long with knee high white socks with stripes under a pair of black shoes. Long gone was his yellow skin, a deep tan was now his skin color. His long nose was now a petite human-like nose. Spongebob wasn’t a square yellow sponge anymore; he was a tall, tan, lean human. Spongebob ran to go wake Patrick up. “Patrick! Patrick! Patrick,” screamed Spongebob, “Our wish came true! Wake up!”

Patrick rolled over and grumbled, “What?”

“Our wish came true buddy! We’re humans!” exclaimed Spongebob.

Patrick jumped out of bed and ran to the mirror. His pink pointy-head was now replaced with a circular head and a muscular chin. His pink skin was now light and pale. He had a little bit of a belly and was six foot one inch tall. He had on a plain white t-shirt with green shorts and flowers on them. Patrick also had a full head of hair, which he thought would be impossible. Patrick was shocked at what he saw.

“Oh my gosh Spongebob.”

“Yeah Patrick?” questioned Spongebob.

“We look…” started Patrick.

“BEAUTIFUL!” screamed Spongebob and Patrick together.

After admiring themselves and making goofy poses in the mirror for a minute or two they got dressed and walked out of their hotel room.

“Uh, Patrick?” asked Spongebob.

“Yeah?” replied Patrick.

“Do you think we need to pay?” Spongebob questioned.

“No! Why would we?” Patrick said.

Spongebob and Patrick had new body-builder bodies and had no idea what to do with them. Wow, I wonder what the Krabby Patties taste like here. We should find one.

“Patrick, we need to go find a Krabby Patty. One that tastes better than the one at the Krusty Krab,” said Spongebob.

“That might be hard Spongebob,” Patrick said knowingly.

“Come on pal, it could be our mission. “

“A mission? Spongebob I love missions!” Patrick squealed.

“Alright. Then let’s go find…the best burger,” Spongebob said dramatically.

They walked to Desert Ridge where they found some of the best burgers. The mall had hundreds of stores. Many stores were clothes stores but only a few were actually restaurants. They checked out all of the restaurants and found the three best places to order a burger from. The two friends got a burger from Yard House, Islands, and In-N-Out. After they had the burgers ordered they sat down on one of the outside tables at In-N-Out. Moment of truth thought Spongebob. They unwrapped their first burger from the Yard House. The aroma of burger filled their noses as they took their first bite. The burger was pure bliss.

“Patrick this burger is amazing!” Spongebob said.

“Yeah Spongebob I agree,” said Patrick with a mouthful of burger.

“Man, I don’t think I could compare this to the Krabby Patty,” stated Spongebob.

“Oh yes you can,” countered Patrick, “is or isn’t this burger better than the Krabby Patty?”


“No,” Spongebob sighed, “it’s not.”

“Then it’s time for the next burger!” Patrick declared hungrily.

The sun was setting as they moved on to their second burger. Hmm, I wonder when we stop being humans. Oh well, thought Spongebob. The second burger they had was from Islands. As they took their first bite the juices oozed out into their mouth and a little bit got on their chin. Spongebob and Patrick could taste all of the different flavors included in the burger. After coming back from heaven they finally spoke.

“Patrick, I think I know what heaven now tastes like,” Spongebob mused.

“I totally agree,” Patrick said.

“So is this one better than a Krabby Patty?” Spongebob asked.

“Um, I say it’s all tied up,” said Patrick.

“Alright then here it goes to the last burger. Every burger has been better than the one before. Let’s see it it’s true,” Spongebob declared.

As they unwrapped their third burger they couldn’t take their eyes off of it. The burger form In-N-Out was pure perfection. The patty, bun, tomatoes, lettuce, and secret sauce were combined to be utterly flawless. If this burger is as good as it tastes, I might marry it, thought Patrick. The two best buds sank their teeth into the perfect burger. After the first bite their eyes got wide and a smile appeared on both of their faces.

“Patrick, I think I have my vote. What about you?” Spongebob questioned.

“Oh yes I do,” Patrick said as he was imagining the wedding.

“Alright then on the count of three we will say our votes out loud. Okay?” Spongebob said.

“Okay,” Patrick agreed.

“One…Two…Three!”

They were about to say their answer when they were zapped back into Bikini Bottom. Spongebob came back to Bikini Bottom with a little jump. He looked around, momentarily forgetting where he was. After he remembered he was in Bikini Bottom he spoke.

“Patrick, did you just have the same daydream I did?” asked Spongebob.

“Was it the one with the merman and the burgers?” Patrick replied.

“Uh-huh. The one with the mission,” said Spongebob.

“Yeah, I just snapped out of it,” Patrick said.

“Me too, do you remember which burger you thought was the best?” Spongebob asked.

“No, you?”

“Not a thing,” replied Spongebob, “Maybe the best burger ever is the Krabby Patty.”

“Yeah, maybe. Hey Spongebob?” asked Patrick.

“Hmm?” replied Spongebob.

“Can we go get a Krabby Patty?”





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