“Woohoo!” The man on the TV screamed as he jumped out of the plane flying high above the ground. The camera zoomed out to show the people still in the plane laughing and clapping. Following the man hurtling towards the ground, the camera showed the man flipping and doing twirls in the air. After a few hundred feet of playing around, the man straightened out and gave a quick little tug to his vest and the camera's view was obstructed by the colorful parachute coming out from the man's back.


Bobby sighed, turning off the TV. He wanted to go sky diving so bad! He loved doing things like that. The thrill, the feel of the danger. The adrenaline rush was wicked! Jet skiing was his thing now. The faster, and the choppier waves, the better. There was nothing he wanted more. Except maybe bungee jumping of a plane. But he didn't think that was legal. Or if it even existed. So he would just have to stick to dreaming about sky diving....unless....it was almost his tenth birthday....He was so excited! Bobby just found the ideal way to go sky diving, his life long dream!


Bobby always got a bunch of money from his grandma for his birthday and Kwanzaa. He still had some left over from Kwanzaa, which was surprising. Usually he would just blow all his money on illegal drugs and booze. His secret stash was running low; he was already out of his hardcore drugs like crack and XTC, but he still had a few joints left that would hopefully last him until Kwanzaa. His booze was dwindling too; he was all out of whiskey, and his mother had jacked his last bottle of vodka.


Bobby's birthday came and went, along with his super-fun party. He had played that game with the donkey and the tail, but he 'accidentally' ended up pinning the tail on one of his friends. He also chased the neighborhood girls around, screaming about cooties. Gross!


The money was stashed under his pillow so he would know if anyone tried to take it. If they did, Bobby already decided that he would have to dismember them with the butcher's knife on his desk. He wasn't sure if the butcher's knife would cut through bone; he was going to try on his baby brother, but his mommy caught him. If it didn't, he would just use his daddy's chainsaw and throw the pieces over a cliff in to the sea.


Using the big book where mommy got all her phone numbers, Bobby looked up the sky diving place. He had saved up enough money, which was good, but you had to be at least 21 years old to participate. That nearly broke little Bobby's heart. But then he realized that was okay; he could pass for a 22 year old midget: his older sister told him so.


So on the day of his sky diving adventure, Bobby hired a taxi to take him and pick him up.


The place was amazing! There were so many big planes and runways and people ready to go up and fly! He was so excited, he could barely hide it!


Bobby signed in and with a little convincing that he was actually 22, he got on the plane. His feet and hands were shaking from excitement. The pilot was going over safety guidelines and rules and directions, but Bobby was to excited to listen. So he didn't bother. He had watched enough videos by now to know what was going on.


Because he was in a smaller group, he was in a helicopter instead of a plane, but he didn't mind. Once they got up to the air he couldn't hear anything. It was so loud! He put his hands over his ears and soon the instructor handed him some earphones. That was a lot better.


They were at the right height now. The instructor helped Bobby put on his equipment, and pointed and gestured to a few different things but Bobby wasn't sure what they did. The instructor said a few more things, but all Bobby could understand was “intense,” “help,” and “parachute landing.” The last thing sounded kind of important but that was okay. But the “intense” part he heard. He got even more excited! It must have meant that this sky diving trip would be more fun then the ones he had seen on TV!


Just then Bobby noticed a tag on his suit that said “Do NOT Pull.” Bobby pointed at it to ask the man what it did, but the man didn't understand. So Bobby tapped on it with a kind of questioning look on his face. That seemed to work. The man opened his mouth as to say, “ohhh,” like he just figured it out. But Bobby never got a chance to hear what it did. All of a sudden he felt a large tug on is back, causing him to fall out of the helicopter. His parachute opened and got tangled in the helicopter's blades. It happened all so fast!


Bobby started spinning round and round the helicopter. This must have been what he meant by intense! He had never had so much fun in his whole life!


He noticed the string connecting him to the parachute tangled in the helicopter blades was fraying. Yippie! This must be the part where he starts to fall! Just then the string snapped and Bobby flew off away from the helicopter. He was flying! He did all those flips and turns in the air! This was the best day of his life! He did another spin in the air. Behind him, he noticed the helicopter was on fire, quickly heading towards ground. This was intense! And well worth giving up his drugs!


He looked down; he was getting awfully close to the ground. Time to let out his parachute! He figured there must be a second parachute in the backpack like vest thing, since the first was used when he was spinning with the helicopter. He searched for the trigger thing that he had to pull to release the parachute. He couldn't find it. That was puzzling. Where could it be? Maybe he could have listened better....Oh! It must be automatic! Duh! How could he miss that? Once he got close enough to the ground it would pop out by itself!


So he continued doing flips and twirls in the air. He couldn't wait to do this again!


All of a sudden there was a huge crash under him. The helicopter had crashed! He guessed the others parachuted to the ground. This was so totally worth his money. Screw drugs!


He was only about thirty feet off the ground when the helicopter exploded. The flames must have hit the gas tank. The flames flew upward, looking like a giant mushroom. That was probably the best part. Bobby squealed with happiness and clapped his hands, speeding towards the ground.


Thats when the flames hit him. Or he hit the flames. He was engulfed in the flames for a second and when he came out, his eyes were on fire!

“Ahhh!” he screamed, “My eyes are on fire!”



And with that final comment, he hit the ground with a big Splat!

The End
08/02/2009