70 is the Smallest Weird Number

May 29, 2010
We looked in our microscopes. We saw nothing on our slides. My eyes kept shutting. Couldn’t find it. My partner came to me and said, “Maybe, maybe we should just give up.” A sigh came out from me. It was true, there was simply no cure to this disease. Even if we looked at every slide in this lab, the chances of actually finding something that may help is virtually impossible. My partner left the lab. I was left alone, still staring in the microscope. It was quiet. All the bacteria were squirming and bumping into each other. Nothing was going on in their own life too. We knew we were here for absolutely no reason. We watch each other with curiosity, wondering who we are and what are we doing. Trying to understand our beliefs, but as time passed they just ignored my presence and went on with their life. I wonder if they even know they exist and if they do, is their life just like ours? Do they have religion? Love? War? Death? Happiness? Sorrow? …Can they even feel? The lights within the microscope began to dim away. One of the bacteria began to reproduce. It started to split and each side began to pull away from each other. Maybe one side didn’t want to split, maybe that side wasn’t ready for the change, and it was afraid, but it did not matter as the other side was ready. Then they split and wandered off, pretending they never knew each other. I guess bacteria don’t believe in families

I took my pills and went to bed. My dorm buddy wasn’t in, yet. Probably with his insane in the membrane girlfriend. Can’t sleep somehow. Still wondering on the lives of microscopic organisms. These thoughts kept attacking my mind until they contorted it. I got up to take more pills, they just weren’t strong enough and I need more. After gulping a few dozen pills my dorm buddy came in. I ignored him and went to bed.

“ Come on Delta, just give it up, this project is impossible to do,” my partner complained. These gripes bounced off from my head. She came behind me, “ Why won’t you give it up? Even you know this whole thing is a mess.” I ignored and continued on with my work. Then she grabbed me by the shoulders, turned me around, and with tears in her eyes said,” Why won’t you answer me? Ever since yesterday you just ignore my thoughts and look at the same slide,” she continued, “ Have you even found anything in that slide that will get us a grant?!” Again, the words somehow couldn’t penetrate my mind and thusly her saddening speech disintegrated as they reached my mind. Tears were rolling down her face. She gave up on me and walked out of the lab, like yesterday. There I was again staring at the same bacteria from yesterday. We just watch each other. They were my cousins, we knew that our blood was related. The bacteria population began to dwindle. Never knew why.

Pop about twenty pills in my mouth and went into my bed. My dorm buddy looked at me. He said,” Dude, there’s something wrong with you.” My ears began to ring and all my buddy’s worrying comments became fuzz. I couldn’t see. That was good.

A bottle of wine was in my left hand

Five pills were within my right hand

That indent was terrible

A person…

My bacteria friends dwindle away.

I heard screaming………….” Hold on……hospital………die…you….die………….no heaven………..not my friend……he pop pills………..20a day…” Was a voice I heard.

I was sitting on a bench. In front of me was an endless sea of clouds. It was beautiful. Next to me a being of light told me, “ Isn’t it magnificent ?” I nodded my head. We both stared at the clouds. “ my son, do you ever wonder about death?” the light being asked.

“ Yes,” I answered. “ Do you wonder where we go after death?” the light being asked again,” Ever think if a god exist , would he help you? And if was true, would you do anything foe him?” I couldn’t answer him. We both silently went back staring at the clouds. The light being got up and told me, while staring at the clouds,” Do you think that god truly exists?”

“ I’m not sure,” I answered. The being walked away. While walking he said, “ I’m the same too, sometimes I wonder if I even exist.”

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