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Silent Hall

The hall is silent and i am scared. a million thoughts run through my mind. Am i the last person alive? Where is everyone? As i walk down this silent hall, i hear a noise that gives me some hope. Its the sound of laughter. Its coming from the end of the hallway. I run to it and open a door but i see no people. I can still hear the laughter but where are the people? I search around the room, trying to find the source. The laughter is coming from everywhere. There has to be a speaker somewhere around here. The laughter fades and then there is silence. The hall is silent and now i am angry. what did i do to deserve this? im a good kid. i never did anything wrong. Wait, could it be because of, no it cant be. But what if it is? what if this is my punishment for it? I shout, I scream, i beg for forgivness, but the hall is silent and now i am lonely. no human company, no one to talk to, just the silent hall.i think i might go insane. Oh no its the laughter again. i pull myself from where i had collapsed and lurch towards the sound. i think its coming from a speaker. i open a door and lord behold i see two people. i weep for i am now not alone. its a man and a woman. they are laughing and having a good time. i speak to them. they dont notice. i reach for the man. my hand passes through him. i do the same with the woman. same outcome. i weep again but these tears are not for joy but sadness. i rush out of the room and run to the end of the hall. i burst through the exit and think i am free. but no i am not. there is another hallway. in fact it is the same hallway. i know this because i stick my head through the door and see my face on the other end of the hall.
the hall is silent and i am scared. someone please help me.



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Beachgirl1 said...
Apr. 19, 2011 at 9:31 am
Wow. This is amazing. AMAZING. It moved quickly and i loved the beginning and the end! The beginning drew me in, and the end was perfect. I just would have elobarted more on a backround, besides that, I loved it! Great work!
 
Annerdy said...
Jan. 31, 2011 at 7:45 pm

This story was very mysterious and suspenseful and kept me guessing. Some of the spelling and grammar are off, so you might want to check that a bit. It made me wonder what the kid did that was so horrible, he ended up in silent hall. You set the mood for confusion and helplessness pretty well, but I wish there was more of a catch to it. There was nothing that really made me think hard. I also wished that you gave more of a background story to the kid so the readers could at least... (more »)

 
qui133 said...
Sept. 1, 2010 at 9:18 am
really creepy. i love it.
 
Writer12 said...
Apr. 25, 2010 at 12:57 pm
I love this story to. its so mysterious. u are a very talented writer.
 
L4dYbuG replied...
Apr. 27, 2010 at 10:37 am
Total American Goth! love it..
 
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