Things happen in rooms, like when my mother died giving birth to my baby brother. I never go into her room anymore, I’m never sad when I’m in the house, I don’t know why, and I always feel numb. When my brother wakes me up in the middle of the night, crying, I don’t get mad, I make him happy again so that he can go back to sleep. When the kids at school teas me I just feel numb. I answer the teacher’s questions, I turned everything in on time, and I always bring my own money for lunch. The counselor is always trying to talk to me but I don’t have much to say. At home my dad is always looking at me with sadness in his eyes. I know he wants me to feel better but I’ll always feel numb no matter what.

It’s my senior year, my favorite color is black, my hair is black, my clothes are black, and my room is almost all black. My dad makes me go to counseling, I don’t need counseling I’m fine! The counselor tells my dad everything that we talk about, that upsets me, and the principal tells my dad that I don’t even try anymore. My dad is always telling me to do better in school, I ask him why, he says because. What do I do to make all the pain go away?