Those around me think I’m insane. Others believe me to be bewitched. The truth is neither of those. I am I, and yet the person I am is the person I wish not to be. Yes I live in such a grand house but it pains me to know that I must live within these walls in solitaire. Nobody to love or to care for. All has abandoned me and yet I still find comfort within my own mind. My past is but a mystery to most and all that was once true has been turned to nothing but gossip. The gossip spread like a flu epidemic and soon all knew the lies. I am alone in a world that is populated by millions all because of these lies, but at times I wonder if the lies are much better than the truth.


11 months earlier…

It was nearly dawn and yet, I had not gotten sleep. I sat in my favorite armchair waiting for the arrival of my family. They had left to visit my parents, but I had stayed home. I feared the worst when I was around my father. He believed me to be the devil’s spawn. I know nothing of why he would think such a thing. My darling Anna had written to me, telling of her and my child’s arrival. They were to return on the morning of October 31. I could think of nothing but her smile and the way she looked at me with her blue eyes. My son took after his mother however. The only thing that proved he was my child was his unbelievably large nose. I cursed my nose. It was my father’s nose, a nose that made me want to cut it off. It seemed to grow larger every time I look in the mirror now I avoid ever looking in one.

The bell. I hear it but I do not want to move. I am filled with so much excitement. I cannot wait to see their faces. Oh the joy! If I were to stand up I would explode into millions of pieces from the excitement that fills me. But I do stand up and open the door. My darling Anna. She stands in the doorway holding our sons hands. She smiles at me and I kiss her. Her lips as soft as rose petals. My son, I look at him, but his eyes are filled with anger. He snarls at me and runs into the house. Before I can grab him to ask questions he is up the stairs and slamming every door he sees. What has happened? My, son who once loved me. He now seems so angry. He now seems to hate me. What have I done wrong? My darling Anna does not look me in the eyes. Instead she slowly walks inside and places the suitcases on the floor. She tells me what has happened. She did not visit my parents. No, she visited her sister. Her sister! That evil witch! She convinced my darling to leave me. She told my Anna that I was no good! In my fit of rage I slapped my darling. Oh no! What have I done? My Anna runs to our room crying. I cannot chase after her. Something has come over me. The house! It is this house! I was told it was possessed by an evil soul and now that soul has taken control of my darling, my son and now me. I have lost them both forever. But no, I will not lose them. I will not allow anyone to take them from me. I will confine them within these walls and I will protect them from those who dare try to steal their love from my heart.

In the dead of night, I can hear my darling speaking with my son. She tries to comfort him. Telling him that I am not as bad as he has heard. Yes! She does still love me. I can feel her love beating in me. There is a chance. But no! Now she tells him to pack. They are to leave while I sleep. She is afraid. Afraid of me. But why? I have not hurt anyone. I had no plan of killing anyone or harming a soul. I listen closely. They are packing fast and closer I listen. I hear her humming. Trying to make the air less tense. But there is no hope now. The air is tense I cannot stop them! But wait, I can. I can stop them. I will stop them! They will stay with me. They will not leave me.

I dress myself for bed. But I have no plans of sleep. I will fool them. And then, when they get ready to leave, I will stop them dead in their tracks. I creep into the living room. I hide within the shadows and I wait. They believe I am truly asleep. They are quiet though, Very quiet. I had no idea they were such sneaky creatures, but not sneaky enough. I have them cornered. Within these walls they will stay. Her hand is on the doorknob, and in her other hand is my son’s hand. It is him also. He and this house. He never loved me, I never loved him. He is the spawn of the devil, not I. But now he has met his time. He will stay but not within this house, but beneath it. In the cellar, where he should have been kept.

There is swooshing sound, and then a thud. I look from the shadows and he lay there. My darling looks towards me. Our eyes meet. She screams, and cries. She tries to run, but then another swoosh and she too falls. At first I am puzzled but I notice it now. It is I who took their lives. But I do not remember. The mess, its so bloody. They are dead but the mess, people will come looking. I must hide everything. I must lie to everyone. They never came. No. Never. They never appeared on the steps. They never did. I did not lay eyes on them. Never. Not since they left. But now what was I to do with the bodies, the blood. Oh! The blood. So much. I cannot stand the color. It reminds me of my childhood. But my childhood seems so blurry but in it is so much blood.

I am quick once I am calm. So that is what I do. I make myself calm. Then I take care of it. I am swift with the mop. Carefully, I drag the bodies to the cellar on a plastic tarp. There is a thud on every step. It takes forever but upon reaching the bottom I smile to myself. Yes, I am almost done. Soon there will be no trace of them. Everything was clean, but now the bodies had to be taken care of. As fast as I can make my weak hands move, I pull out the blocks in the cellar wall. They slide out easily as long as I do it right. Only I know this way. It is a hole. I hide my most valuable possessions within it. And now I will hide my love within it. They seem so much lighter now. I throw them in the hole and carefully, and perfectly place the blocks back into place. It is done. My work has been finished and now I will rest. The night is peaceful and my mind is clear.

In the morning I wake and find myself in such a serene mood. The night was such joyous fun. My love will be with me forever and ever. Within these walls we will stay and not a soul will be able to move us.


Back to the present…

My story is told. Am I insane? No, I am brilliant. But now I feel no love for my Anna. She now bores me. She will not talk or eat. I feel I must move on. But I know that in this house, I will stay and I will find a new love to share my home with.