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How to Guard Yourself Against Weird, Quirky, and Downright obnoxious Relatives
Quit any games of Scrabble that last more than two days.
If your five-year-old cousin asks you to please play 52 Pick-Up with him, refuse and run away.
In all ways be savvy and up-to date on
the latest child pranks.
If you see that Grandma is making dinner,
go ahead and put 911 on speed dial.
Reject any invitations to help clean the fish
your uncle wants to cook for supper.
Beware of any fashion tips given by
your step-half-second cousin’s grandma.
If the conversation turns to politics,
change the subject immediately.
And never eat the green pea jello.