The man stealthily lurked through the darkness waiting for someone to catch him. Nobody came out of the lurking darkness that stood behind him. He turned back quickly one more time and then turned back to what he was doing.

He walked over to a tall sharp fence and climbed over it snagging part of his black coat going over, ripping it.

He grumbled once he got over lifting up the ripped side.

“I’ll fix it later!” he mumbled gruffly as he started walking toward a huge looming building.

“He’s coming! hurry! In your positions!” said a big armed guard looking from a tall look out tower.

Down below was a dark figure of a man walking towards the guard tower.

The man looked up at all the armed guards and froze.

“Crap!” he said under his breath looking down from the light that was casted on him.

“Well, well, long time no see ah?” said a man in a red uniform with so many medals on the suit you could definitely tell that he was in charge.

“You, have been causing trouble, all around the country side. Stealing, and causing a ruckus among the people of the towns.” the red suited man continued, staring straight in the masked mans black eyes.

He then looked down at the coat. “It seems like you have been causing even more of a ruckus as well. Where do you think your going?” asked the red suit man fingering the tared fabric of the coat.

The man in the mask didn’t answer.

“Hmmm, you want to be difficult ah?” asked the man taking out a silver pistol.

“Well then, I will too.” the red suit man holding the pistol over the masked mans heart.

“It seems like you have earned yourself a new name through theses past weeks. People now call you NightStalker.” the red suit man continued slyly.

“Did you, know about this?” asked the red suit man.

The masked man gripped the gun in his left hand hard.

It appeared that the suited man noticed because then he said: “Ah, it seems you don’t like this name? You don’t, do you?” asked the suited man peering at the masked man closely.

Then speaking for the first time, the masked man spoke in a deep rich voice, “Why, why would I like this name? It is a name of a monster. Not a human being.”

“Well, you’re not, How do I put it nicely, not a human being. I mean come on, the way you climb so gracefully, the way you can get around an enemy so quietly, or how you can shoot twenty men with only one bullet.” the suited man said holding one finger and continuing. “This, is not normal.” the suited man shook his finger at him.

“How, how do you do it?” the suited man asked him.

The masked man responded, “Practice.” he said simply.

“How could you say that? just practice? I don’t think so! So tell me, how is this possible? Are you an alien? Did you fall in some toxic waste? What?!” demanded the red suited man.

“Toxic waste? Do you really think I'm some super hero?” asked the masked man in disbelief.

“Well then how is the things you do possible?” he asked.

“I have my ways” said the dressed in black masked man said mysteriously.

The red suited man started to pace around in circle still keeping the gun poised at the masked mans heart.

“Well,since it seems like you won’t give give me answers, I guess I will have to shoot the answer out of you!” the red suited man said.

He then pointed the gun at the masked man and locked the gun aiming at his chest.

“Tell me, or I will shoot you” demanded the suited man.

“No” the masked man said firmly.

“Well then, I’m sorry to say that you will be in a hospital bed for quiet some time” said the red suited man ready to pull back the trigger.

Then the man in the mask kicked the gun out of his hand knocking it all the way to a flimsy willow tree to the left.

The masked man took out his black shiny gun gracefully and pointed it at the suited mans heart.

“Well now, we don’t have to be harsh on this matter, put the gun down” the suited man motioned to put the gun on the grassy floor.

“says the man who was about ready to shoot me!” laughed the masked man not putting the gun down but putting the gun closer to the mans heart.

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to shoot you” the masked man said, the suited man sighing with relief. “I’m just going to give you a little reminder that you can’t beat me that easily!” and with that the masked man shot his foot.

Join the Discussion

This article has 84 comments. Post your own now!

Icithra This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Feb. 8, 2014 at 8:45 pm
I like your writing style, especially the dialogue, which sounds realistic. However, in the first paragraph, and this just might be a pet peeve of mine, you repeated words like lurking and darkness. Great writing though. If you don't mind, could you check out some of my work? Thank you, and keep writing. This is great
Caesar123 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jul. 31, 2013 at 12:44 am
I agree with Kitty Cat. Not really a plot, theme, or even much of a setting. The character’s are developed somewhat, but could be pushed farther. I also say this story has potential, but it needs a lot of key components, as well as fixed up grammar. But keep working!
Free.Spirit replied...
Feb. 5, 2014 at 10:20 am
Thanks for commenting! And yes, I'm still working on it and developing it! :) ~ Free :)(;
KittyCat'sAreCool said...
May 17, 2012 at 9:30 am
I think the story has great potential, but they're isn't really a plot or a theme, it's just mashed together words. It's kind of pointless. Keep working on it though, and like what's already been said, work on your grammar and etc. :) 
Free.Me.Maybe. replied...
Jul. 11, 2012 at 5:31 pm

Thank  you so much! And yes, I should have worked on it better and the grammar. Thanks for reading! :D


~Free :)(:

writer3499 said...
May 12, 2012 at 1:03 pm
Wow this is really awsome! I loved the ending! Would you ind commenting on some of my work?? But this is great...keep writing!
Free.Living.Winged. replied...
May 12, 2012 at 6:35 pm
Thanks so much!!! i'm glad people like it!!! I posted more chapters just so you know! :D and of course! I would love to check out some of your work! :)(:
RalphPrestonKlaus said...
Apr. 25, 2012 at 10:49 am
the ending's nice... different somewhat. were u going for a do-gooder sort of image for the Nightstalker?
Free.Living.Winged. replied...
May 12, 2012 at 6:37 pm

Thanks for reading!!


~Free :)(:

tyty25 said...
Feb. 6, 2012 at 2:35 pm
I like how unique this is. It has a nice plot and charachter development is good. Great job!
writerfreak21231 replied...
Feb. 6, 2012 at 3:27 pm
Thank you sooo very much! I haven't had a comment on this story in ages! I was starting to loose hope! If you liked this then you might want to check out the other chapters! Thank you for commenting! I will read one of your stories! :)(:
Jamie1581 said...
Jan. 2, 2012 at 1:55 am
Man this is amazing, i only found a few grammatical errors. but otherwise i love the way this story is composed and is very vague, it gives a very how can i put it, viewpoint of the NightStalker
writerfreak21231 replied...
Jan. 9, 2012 at 4:29 pm
thank you for commenting! and i will try to describe it better and fix the errors. if u liked this there are plenty more chapters already posted! In fact i just posted 5,6, and 7 a little while ago and they are now posted! you can chek them out if you want! :)(:
Def_Leppard_fan120 said...
Dec. 27, 2011 at 3:44 am
Come check out my paper it is called THE BATTLE and comment on what u liked or disliked about it.
writerfreak21231 replied...
Dec. 27, 2011 at 8:45 pm
Kk I will! Did you like Nightstalker?
clumsyteardropper said...
Oct. 5, 2011 at 5:11 pm
i liked this :))  it's very interesting... i want more haha :D
needs work on grammar, as people have said... but dont let that stop you!  keep writing!!  good work ;D
writerfreak21231 replied...
Oct. 9, 2011 at 10:39 am
thank you sooooooooo much!!!!!!! I will check out some of your work!  sorry i havent gotten back! :)(:
Strike_Eagle said...
Sept. 4, 2011 at 1:44 pm
It sounds like the beginning of a good story.  However, it would be much easier to read if the grammer was better.
writerfreak21231 replied...
Feb. 20, 2012 at 2:14 pm
Thank you :)(:
storm lily said...
Aug. 31, 2011 at 2:52 pm
this is a great concept but the sentences didn't flow very well and some grammar was off
bRealTime banner ad on the left side
Site Feedback