Humiliation Castrastion II

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A faint fog was formed as the cool artificial air of the 7/11 permeated the hot, polluted, and above all, humid air of New York. Unlike the way I came in, I used the automatic door this time instead of crashing through another window. As I strode out of the sliding doors, I savored what was in my hand. In my hand was probably the only thing that I would kill two men and accidently castrate one for. In my hand was one of the most epically awesome, awe inspiring things that give my life a purpose. In my hand was… a large Coke ICEE. With its glistening, frosty, sweet amber goodness, and the fact that it only cost 2.99, it was truly a foam cup filled with liquid gold.

I sighed, more content with the world then when I was when I crashed through the window of the store to get my ICEE. I looked back at the carnage I wrought in the store, from the poor Arabic man that I had accidently castrated, to the Asian assassin that had tried to kill me and now had a throwing knife stuck through his head, the tip of the knife jetting out from the back of his skull. I shuddered when I thought of the piercing scream that emitted from the Arabic as my throwing knife sliced through his… privates. I just hope his heart gave out before the whole operation was over. As for the other man… it seems I now have enemies here in New York.

“And I just got here,” I murmured to myself.

Checking that the money for the ICEE was still on the table, I turned back… and froze as a shiny, fast moving projectile whipped past me head and buried itself in the concrete wall of the 7/11 behind me. Springing into action I dove forward as another projectile flew into the space I previously occupied. Taking cover behind a sturdy red Ford F-150, I quickly flicked on my HUD. My glasses once again flared to life as the display popped up with the usual,

“NEAR MISS. +50 POINTS”

“I’ve seriously gotta fix that when I get to home,” I muttered.

Carefully peering over the edge of the Ford, I scanned the tops of the buildings to locate the source of the raining projectiles. There. On top of a four story tower of steel and glass, a red diamond lit up and the glasses whirred as they zoomed in, displaying a lone man hunched over a crossbow with another bolt loaded into the barrel.

Suddenly the bolt vanished from view as the man took the shot.

“Crap!” I shouted.
I ducked down behind the ford again. A dull thunk echoed from the vehicle as the bolt pierced the metal skin of the Ford. Opening my eyes again, I heard a faint beeping sound emit from the car. I stood still, wondering what the beeping sound was. The beeping got faster and raised a pitch when I realized…
“Oh my God! It’s a bomb!” I shouted.

I rolled forward and sprung up and sprinted away from the red Ford and leaped over the safety of a large dumpster.

The explosive bolt detonated in a large explosion and the car blew up in a wave of shrapnel and flaming gasoline. The shock-wave caught me in mid-air as I flew over the dumpster. I tumbled forward and landed thankfully on my back behind the dumpster as semi-melted metal flew over the large makeshift shield.

“That’s it,” I said, “No more Mr. Nice Agent,”





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