pablo and his adventure

June 8, 2010
By 4darceo1 BRONZE, Woodbun, Oregon
4darceo1 BRONZE, Woodbun, Oregon
1 article 0 photos 0 comments


There once was a little boy named Pablo how went to school and couldn’t wait for Friday’s to come because every Friday he go’s walking threw a forest to go to his dad’s house. Just thinking about it his schools days went by very slow. But after this Friday his Fridays are never going be the same.
So it was typical day as always he couldn’t wait until the day was over, because after school he was going to his dads house. He remembered his dad
promised him he was going to go take him for a ride in the jeep to go show him the
club house his dad made. Where he Can see every thing including his dads house. So
school was over and he went toward the forest where he saw the path he made for
he can’t get lost and also for he can get to his dads house quicker and earlier.
While he was in the path he saw lots of animals. While he was looking at the animals his mind out off nowhere thought on going through a short cut. He knew that if he went through a short cut he could end up getting lost. But his curiosity and
adventurous got to him quick that he ended up going on the short cut that he didn’t
know of or never seen before in his life.
After he walked 4 miles he started getting tired and he realized that it was getting Dark so fast and that he would have been at his dads house hours ago so he decides To stop go back but while he was going back he didn’t recognized nothing and he noticed that he was lost already and he couldn’t spot the path nowhere now the only thing that was in his head was” There I’m dead”.
From him thinking so much he fell asleep randomly. He woke up and it was pitch dark he remember that on lunch his friend has given him a small little flash light his friend has won by hustling a smaller kid than him in school in playing cards. He decides to make a trail for just in case he get lost on the way he can go back from where he started. So he picks up some rocks and stuck them in to the ground as he walked he thought why not just get on top of a tree and brake down some branches. So gets on top of the trees and jumps on the branches and brakes them down he decides to stop when he had a pile big enough to make a big pile once he couldn’t reach the braches he goes to the bushes and yanks off some stick. Now the only thing he needed was to go find so big rocks so he can make a fire.
So walks and walk till he found his perfect rocks and goes back the pile of branches. He rubs the rocks together and sees sparks. He do’s it close to the pile of braches and starts it on fire on the thing going on his head is “I m going home”.
Six hours later he realizes that that he fire is stopping and he doesn’t have no more
extra to put. When he sees a helicopter a couple miles away he get up from the
ground and starts jumping up and down the helicopter spotted Pablo and stop to get
him when the helicopter stopped a guy got out he thought “he looks so familiar’
the guy turns around and he saw it was his dad he was so excited he felt like his
heart was pounding 100 miles per hour.
When Pablo got home he told his dad that he would never ever take another path but his dad told him that he was never going walking again he will this time wait for a ride. That was the most adventurous thing he did in his live.

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This article has 2 comments.

on Jul. 14 2010 at 12:57 pm
JorJorBinks BRONZE, Blah, Oklahoma
4 articles 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
When life gives you lemons you yell at it "Who the heck told you i wanted lemons!"

I liked it, but it needs a bit of work. Practice makes perfect, so keep on writing! :)

on Jul. 9 2010 at 1:09 pm
ThatClarinetPerson SILVER, Tequesta, Florida
8 articles 0 photos 227 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Life. Don't talk to me about life."
~Marvin the Paranoid Android (from the Hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy series)
Statistical analysis suggests that i am probably in tune with someone
(hahahahaha! I love this cause i'm never ever ever in tune >o

4darceo1, i am going to be frank with you. your story needs work. lots of it. it seemed just like "he saw this then he did that and after he did this the end." it was full of run on sentences, too. there's not very much to this story, either. it doesn't make me feel scared or happy or much of anything or make me want to know what happens next. he gets lost. he makes a fire. his dad finds him. the end. it has a lot of potential; you could make him stay in the woods for a couple days and he has to find food and water and shelter, maybe. or he gets in the way of an angry bear and has to fend it off...use your imagination.

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