A Drastic Experience

September 1, 2012
By Anonymous

Memories are like the movements of the ocean. The visible waves are the memories I would like to remember. But because the waves are vast, the ripples are less noticeable. The small ripples are the memories that I would want to forget. However, these waves and ripples make up the whole ocean just like how memories, good or bad, make up who I am today. There is a memory that has been hidden in me, and it has influenced me greatly to who I am today.

I remember March 25th, 2009, vividly. I still was not finished with my homework, despite that it was already 10 o’clock: the time my mom heads back from work. As I was rushing to finish my homework, I heard the rattling of the garage.

”Mom, is that you?” I asked. Terrified instead, I saw three men dressed in black with ski masks on. They started duct taping various parts of my body. Confused of what was going on, all I worried about was the safety of my family. As I heard the footsteps drifting further away, I scrambled to remove all the tape from my body. Because Internet was the only source of communication, I anxiously notified all my friends, wishing that they would call the police.

However, all hope was lost when a man approached me with the gun. “Sit the hell down!” he yelled pointing the gun to my head. I grabbed a hold of his leg and told him that I’ll give him anything as long as my family was alright. As I anticipated for the sound of the trigger, I closed my eyes and envisioned the life I would have had, but at that moment, the hopes of living already seemed to have vanished. Fortunately, the sound of the garage startled the robbers. Once again, I tried to escape to check on my family. However, I was soon discovered by a different man who threw me onto the floor, duct taping me once again. He dragged me into the bathroom where I heard my grandma’s cries and my sister’s heavy breathing. Even though my hands were duct taped, I forced my fingers out to touch my grandma’s shivering hands. As I felt my grandma’s body trembling next to mine, a man poured liquid on us. “I’ll burn you all if any one of you had called the police, I’ll burn you all,” he screamed. After a while, they all finally left.

This dreadful experience shaped me into the brave individual I am today. There is a quote from Tuesdays with Morrie that said, “When you learn how to die, you learn how to live.” The robbery taught me how to live a more meaningful life. I especially learned to appreciate those around me by helping others to the best of my ability and also working hard to achieve happiness. Throughout my life, I learned that no matter how hard reality hits you and how much it affects you, never give up because eventually, your hard work will pay off. With my ambition to succeed and my ability to work hard, I try my best in everything I do. Many times have I failed on doing the things I have tried hardest in, but I remained on my feet, eager to try again. I believe that this persistence will get me eventually, to my success and happiness.

The author's comments:
Hey guys! Please tell me your opinions on the essay. Thank you very much. :)

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This article has 2 comments.

on Sep. 11 2012 at 6:50 pm
dolphincrazy226 BRONZE, Madison, Alabama
4 articles 2 photos 28 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life is Good!

Incredible story that is great for a college essay.  Try and emphasize on what you were thinking in that last part of the memory, it will end it off a bit easier.  choose some part in the experience to make that single moment more important that the rest and make it so that there is one thought that helped you go through the robbery and the aftermath.  Then you can derive all of your personality from that.  And in the last sentence, add a comma before eventually to separate it from the rest of the sentence if you want a slight pause. Great job!  And keep going at it:)

robertm said...
on Sep. 8 2012 at 7:35 pm
fantastic story, but you need to aviod using words lile "shaped me into the individual i am today" for they will bore the readers of your application and sound cliche. it was a nice essay but be more concice in the beginning it confused me. it was good im just trying to help im not trying to be harsh. hope it helps

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