I think the scariest fears are the ones that can happen everyday. Fear of spiders and heights are no fun, and I pity anyonewho has a fear of clowns, although we don't usually face thosefears every day. My biggest fear is of failure.
It allstarted when I was in elementary school. I had troublelearning as fast as other kids; I never understood as well oras fast. I never knew what the teacher was talking about and Ihad trouble reading. When I didn't study, I failed. Even whenI tried studying really hard, I still failed. Soon I gave uptrying. In third grade my teacher noticed and had me tested.Afterwards my teacher talked to my parents who explained to methat I had dyslexia. I was eight, and had no clue whatdyslexia was. All I knew was that three times a week I had toleave class to work with a tutor. I didn't like school toomuch before this and after I started seeing the tutor, I beganto hate it. Before, I could stay silent in class if there wasa question I didn't know the answer to. Now I had to answerevery question: I could no longer be a wallflower letting theother kids answer question after question.
Thenone day I had a breakthrough on a spelling test I had studiedfor all week. Suddenly, all the answers started coming to me;I used techniques my tutor had taught me and they worked.After that test I started to feel more confident and soondidn't need a tutor. Yet, even today, there are times when Ifeel like I don't belong. I fear one day I will go to classand all the other kids will be smarter than me and I'll againbecome that scared third-grader who doesn't want to raise hishand. That's my biggest fear.
This piece has been published in Teen Ink’s monthly print magazine.