A Written Silhouette This work is considered exceptional by our editorial staff.

September 1, 2010
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She has never been called captivating or fascinating. She does not always feel beautiful. Her brown eyes are sheltered by long lashes. Her brown hair slowly inches its way down her long back. She wears make-up daily to enhance the features she cannot see. She wears clothes that cover her flaws. She has an average frame that can withstand cruel remarks.

She can take criticism but is not fully confident. She sometimes even cries for no reason at all. She laughs as things that aren’t funny. She likes to have fun and do crazy things. She likes to try new restaurants and attempt to use chopsticks. She loves to go to church and quietly pray on her knees. She loves to sing when she is alone and loves to dance when no one is watching.

Her dream is to become a geriatric nurse and help the generation that made hers. She wants to take a random vacation and discover new land. She has no desire to become the first lady or to change things she can’t. She wants to save a life. She wants to be looked up to. She wants to swim with the whales and talk to the lonely kid at the lunch table. She wants to learn a new language and hug a stranger.

After all the obstacles in her life, she can confidently tackle a new chapter in her story. After attending a funeral she can appreciate life. After being in a room full of strangers, she can step outside her comfort zone. After getting a job she can cherish the cost of possessions. After writing essays and doing lots of homework in high school, she can now take on college. Her name is Alexis Elizabeth.

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This article has 16 comments. Post your own now!

Sonza said...
Oct. 26, 2012 at 3:16 am
really nice, alexis!!  
TayTay96 said...
Oct. 4, 2012 at 5:41 pm
I love how you wrote in third person about yourself. I just had to write an essay like this for my English class last week and yours is better than mine :P I'm better at writing in first person
SilverSun said...
May 25, 2012 at 9:00 pm
Awesome story! I especially love the title you chose(:
wishingtheskywasbluer This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
May 25, 2012 at 3:14 pm
you did such a great job with this piece:) loved it!!!
billgamesh11 said...
May 3, 2012 at 8:46 pm
Wow! This is really good! Plus, this sounds a lot like me :)
DarkIsThyThought said...
May 3, 2012 at 8:40 am
I know nothing about what college essays are about or what they are for. However, this is a really good one. The third person makes it read like a spontaneous story, and I like you're attitude. It is not depressed, but strong.
Fia-fia said...
Mar. 19, 2012 at 9:30 pm

THis is really really good and creative!!! Thank you soooooo much! I really like how you look and analzye the character! Esp in teh third person! THank you and keep up the good work!!!


BrianaK said...
Mar. 19, 2012 at 2:31 pm
I really liked the third person. It was good and on a scale 1-10, I would give you a 10. Fantastic Job!
Elizabeth said...
Mar. 17, 2012 at 6:28 pm
No, Her name is Elizabeth, this story is like written about me haha. I like it!
irishlass317 said...
Mar. 17, 2012 at 5:52 pm
Oh my goodness this is amazing!!!!! :D Great job!! I can totally relate!!!!!!!
Sophia_Cornwall said...
Mar. 17, 2012 at 12:36 pm
This is fabulous!  I love the way it reads smoothly yet seems to delve so deeply into personality.  Very unique, and a treat to read!
firecleansed said...
Feb. 23, 2012 at 11:03 am
The third person use is great. The warm usage of words makes it read like a story not an essay
eliana924 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Dec. 20, 2011 at 7:57 pm
I love the idea of using third person. Very unusual, especially because college essays are personal.
cdmswimmer9 said...
Jun. 7, 2011 at 11:25 pm
I loveee how you wrote it so differently than the average essay. Really cool idea!
berryxd said...
Nov. 1, 2010 at 5:33 pm
i liked this alot and i wonder it its ok if i take your idea and lay out my essay as you did
anonymous said...
Sept. 27, 2010 at 7:33 pm
A very captivating essay. 
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