Good times

May 29, 2009
By Anonymous

Soaring buildings tower over hectic streets, but quiet nights in the gentle suburbs. There’s always something to do, and excitement at every corner. This is what you get in the city of Atlanta Georgia, a place I’m always up to visit. With all this enjoyment there is in this marvelous city, I left out one important thing that keeps me coming back. Family, something that overcomes all cities superiority. In Atlanta there’s always something to do, beautiful things to see, most importantly you get to do them with family.

Atlanta is a large city, and it’s very effortless to entertain your self. Doesn’t matter if what your into, I guaranty there is something for you. You can fall in love with the street side restaurants, or Get lost in the biggest aquarium in the world. You can do it all while still enjoying the beautiful sites. Stores

Roaring buildings, fancy, and supper stars can all be found in Atlanta. Your eyes will explode with beauty, from the majestic trees, too the flashes of the bright streets. In Atlanta there’s always something to do, beautiful things to see, most importantly you get to do them with your family

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This article has 7 comments.

on Sep. 29 2009 at 12:04 pm
i love the description and explainatroy and you should keep it up.

way2chunky said...
on Sep. 17 2009 at 6:04 am
way2chunky, Wallingford, Connecticut
0 articles 0 photos 2 comments
hey it's a good essay, in the aspect of topic...writing about family will definitely communicate something about your values regarding family to the college admissions officers.

the one thing to work on the most, it seems to me, is to quit making extensive claims and offer the reader an exhibition of your thoughts. show, don't tell.

for example, instead of writing "there's always something to do" (telling me a fact), you could write something along the lines of: "the streets are open, they offer the way to a Frisbee disc toss at Piedmont park, a trip to the zoo or a simple stroll downtown" (showing me a fact).

p.s. i live in atlanta, it's a thriving city that will make it big one day.

on Sep. 9 2009 at 10:12 pm
Zakaria El-tayash BRONZE, Columbia, Missouri
1 article 0 photos 2 comments
well sorry!! but i had a day to post this for extra credit in my class and had no time to look it over

i wrote it in a hour and posted it

grenup said...
on Sep. 8 2009 at 4:40 pm
There are a lot of spelling and gramitcal mistakes. Why was this posted without being looked over first? Some of them are so obvious, and for a college essay it's kind of hard to belive you missed them.

For example, in the second line from the bottom, you used the wrong 'to'.

'too' that you used is used for saying things like 'I'm coming too' or "She wants one too'

Look over, and proof read you work before submitting it.

hellogirl GOLD said...
on Sep. 5 2009 at 5:30 pm
hellogirl GOLD, La Habra, California
14 articles 0 photos 27 comments
I dont know who wrote this but it is good.

readboy said...
on Aug. 23 2009 at 12:49 am
nice work bro love it


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