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Inside the Mind of a Bastard Child

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Author's note: I want to write this to free others to tell their stories and to encourage them that they are not...  Show full author's note »
Author's note: I want to write this to free others to tell their stories and to encourage them that they are not on this earth alone and destitute. No matter what hand you are dealt in this life you can make it if you really want. Even when you feel you have failed or feel like you are stuck in one place, useless, alone, untalented, unqualified for success, undeserving of love or any other label you can slap on yourself you are nothing short of perfectly designed. Each and every person has a story to share and if we all shared ours we would break down the walls that isolate us in our pain and see that maybe this world was created to be more then a holding cell imprisoning us into a life of meaninglessness.  « Hide author's note
Chapters:   « Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 ... 9 Next »

Me...

I am Bastard Child, Yes, that's exactly what I said.
Bastard
If you are offended or feel violated you have no right to be
This name is simply the title given to me
Truthfully my name is Marie

Marie Angelique Poss

My father is not my own and credited me the nick name
His name is Gene Donald Poss
For all the things I hate, one thing I am grateful for
He gave me a last name
Another to recall is he gave my infant self a place to be...seeing as mother left me
She left me with my sister Rachael who belongs by blood to both
I have nine brothers and three sisters if we don't count DNA too carefully
I grew up mostly though with Rach
The others acting like a passerby. . . . in and out of my life

My mother is a whore
A druggy, and a drunk
Her hand hits hard and her words are sharp

My now father is a drinker
He likes coke, meth, heroin and pot
He yells a whole lot and hesitates not a single second to hammer a mistake

He has a problem keeping his hands to himself
He seems to believe sexual acts are for everyone
He has been to prison enough to call it home
He killed a kid at thirteen and his sarcasm is more than mean

Now that you know the basic details of my start
I'd like to begin with a description of me
Keep in mind however this is younger me
The first pictures of my growing up years and not who I am to become

I plan to take you through these pages
Each memory and tale
Know that I will grow as the stories go
And my circumstances start here with these details
But they don't stay the same...









My eyes are bright green
Bits of ocean blue eliminate the rim and golden brown burst from the center
My lips are full and a rose color
My skin is smooth and white with hints of pink
My facial features rounded with childish chub
My nose and cheeks freckled
My body short and broad
My hair sandy brown readying itself to darken

I am fearlessly adventurous
I am terrified of people
I will be silent until I am forced
When I talk I talk a lot
I am sarcastic and a smart-aleck
I scream and kick walls
I do not want your affection
I do not want to be touched
I will disappear into the wall

I hate the dark and despise when people yell
I have trouble in school
I have a gap in my front teeth
I have had long hair and a rat tail

Kids call me trailer trash
Motherless and dirt

I roll my eyes a lot
I can run very fast
My temper has the better part of me
And I see the world as a challenge that I will beat



















So Hello!
Welcome to my brain
Welcome to the dwelling place of my secret sins and shames
Prepare yourself
For this is the heart of a Bastard Kid
Chapters:   « Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 ... 9 Next »


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This book has 72 comments. Post your own!

emilybwrites said...
Aug. 13, 2011 at 1:26 pm:
wow this was just fabulous. check out my poem "Forgotten Domain" and please comment/rate it!!!
 
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afflatus said...
Aug. 5, 2011 at 3:35 am:
hey hi marie....awesome work there..but u know marie this world is full of bad things and bad people...that came across ur way..and it's upto u whether u chose the right way or the wrong way....and m happy that u put urself together and u chose to follow the right one and that made all the difference...<3<3!
 
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renthead96 said...
Aug. 1, 2011 at 10:44 am:
The detail of this story is amazing, and necessary to show the reader the struggles you went through. I am very sorry about all that has happened to you, but I am grateful to you for sharing your story. It takes a brave and willing young person to be able to recall such events as this, and I admire you for it. I feel the unique writing style used in this story fit well with the concept of "seeing into one's mind." Thank you for sharing this.
 
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Danealle said...
Jul. 9, 2011 at 10:14 am:
I am speechless... the detail is wonderful! I think you will be able to relate to the book I wrote. I'll admit it's not as intense but still good. It's called "Even Though" it's under the name Danealle K
 
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.Izzy. said...
Jun. 10, 2011 at 1:32 pm:
This was absolutely amazing. Some of the chapters horrified me and made me realize how much I take for granted. This story is powerful  and unforgetable. You are such an inspiration, thank you for sharing your story.
 
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YoungsurvivorLiz said...
May 9, 2011 at 9:59 pm:
My Gosh, this was just marvelous. I have to tell you how much i admire you, eventhough I may never meet you. The things you had to go trough were incredible and to have come out victories of it was amazing. Precisly at this moment I do not have words to express the emotions I am feeling. Yet I must tell you that your story I will always cherish and remember for the great amount of wisdow it has brought to my life, I know now that I am not alone out there in the world. THANKYOU VERY MUCH
 
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Maurleena M. said...
Apr. 26, 2011 at 6:15 pm:
omg I love this article
 
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lizditty said...
Apr. 25, 2011 at 4:00 pm:

OH MY GOOOOODNES, THIS WAS INCREDIBLE. SUCH A WAY WITH WORDS, AND SUCH POWER FROM THEM.

As i reader, i felt very connected to the writer, and i felt absorbed by the way the writer jumps around to different times. i liked how i had to read a little and think about what was going on.

you write so well, if this became a book, i know i wouldn't be able to put it down. i'm so glad you want to share your story with other's- it's life changing.

PLEASE KEEP WRITING.

 
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imperfection said...
Apr. 23, 2011 at 10:21 pm:
If this was a book, I'd buy it. Keep writing. You can be a bestselling author. It is amazing that you survived through this and that you now have the courage to write it down, and the poetic form makes it so much deeper. Please keep writing. I wish I was in touch with publishing companies. I want to read this as a book! You're an amazing author!
 
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joeyrobs said...
Apr. 21, 2011 at 11:18 am:
truely touching shows how life can be so cruel to some but thhey have the strength to change it. incredible book i hope it goes far it deserves to!
 
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claire said...
Apr. 20, 2011 at 5:38 pm:
I can't really imagine the personal strength it must have taken to get to this point in your life & to write this book, but thank you Marie for sharing your story with us. 
 
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Millsy said...
Apr. 19, 2011 at 11:07 am:
You are inspirational.  Your book will give Hope to so many who have had theirs taken away.  
 
Millsy replied...
Apr. 19, 2011 at 11:09 am :
p.s I wanted to give it 5 stars but I couldn't click on more than 1! 
 
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Marieweibel said...
Apr. 16, 2011 at 9:06 am:
Also for those of you who have read my chapter sum ups, I had not intened to send those in the way they were. I need to clarify something I over looked, the fourth family I lived with their discription is not fair. I was making an outline for myself...and when I wrote it I was thinking of my own inner tormoil and lables I placed on myself not the people. They were an incredible group of colorful people who did their best in a hard situation of taking in orphans. They are good people who are stil... (more »)
 
opus replied...
Apr. 16, 2011 at 7:50 pm :
I loverrrrrrr you Marie!
 
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Marieweibel said...
Apr. 16, 2011 at 9:03 am:
Thank you all for your support, it means so very much to me. You are helping me to accomplish two very big dreams of mine. The first and least important, is to make a mark in the litature world so I might become a fiction writter some day without the poetry edge. The second and much greater dream, that this story will be told so that the lost, broken, and alone can find a hope and know how very important their life is.
 
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Tina said...
Apr. 15, 2011 at 4:12 pm:
***** five stars is what I pressed and only four came up!! What an amazing piece of honesty Marie...i think it's the hardest thing we humans can do, be honest with ourselves and with others...you are an extremely talented and brave young woman and I am so proud to know you. 
 
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SamBach said...
Apr. 15, 2011 at 12:05 pm:
Wow, you really are an amazing writer. Rachael has told me you were very good, but I never imagined. You should keep writing. Thanks for sharing so much.
 
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srg11 said...
Apr. 15, 2011 at 10:14 am:
you are a beautiful person and a superb writer!!
 
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MaryAnne said...
Apr. 15, 2011 at 9:58 am:
A true tale of survival.  Thank you for your brutal and painful honesty.  God bless you.  
 
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