Aligned

June 22, 2014

By gboo12, Bergen County, NJ

Your teeth
Aligned
Not perfectly
But (perfect)
Like the way
Stars are (aligned)

Jumbled up
Some (looked) different
Like The Others
More yellow with light
More white with darkness

They were not
Ideal or
Flawless or
Ones that someone wished for

But the thing about stars
Is that they are not perfect
But we wish upon them anyways
Like I wish upon them

Hoping that one day
Your teeth
Will be clenching
My lower lip
Pulling me back
In
For another kiss

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MissEmilyDickinson said...
Oct. 13, 2014 at 11:01 am

Haha, this is absolutely fantastic and wonderful. :) I love the whole idea and creativity. It's just amazing. :) It's just sweet and creative and just ... phenomenal. :) You are an amazing writer and person. You do have and talent and light in you. Thank you so much, for sharing this. :)

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Liv.Harris said...
Jun. 29, 2014 at 3:06 pm

Wow,,, this was fantastic!!!!!

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Midnight5765 said...
Jun. 28, 2014 at 4:09 pm

I like how you made me go back from thinking about teeth to stars. I never saw the similarities before like how they are not all bright. I keep re-reading the fourth stanza- keep writing!

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WinterRose1976 said...
Jun. 28, 2014 at 1:02 pm

This poem deserves five stars for creativity! I have never read a poem comparing teeth to stars. What an interesting idea! Very original and beautifully written. :)

Gracefully replied...
Jun. 28, 2014 at 3:20 pm

thank you so much. really means a lot when others enjoy my work like you do :) thank you again!

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WOWriting said...
Jun. 25, 2014 at 3:03 am

This is breautiful :) i like your use of parentheses and emphasis of the teeth not being perfect, but being perfect because of that

Gracefully replied...
Jun. 28, 2014 at 3:21 pm

thank you so much. i appreciate your opinion very much!

AutumnMoon replied...
Oct. 16, 2014 at 10:27 am

I really liked this poem. It was playful and fun the way you compared someone's teeth to the stars. I really liked it. I didn't quite understand why some words were in parentheses though. Overall, nicely done!