He Didn't Make It.

July 25, 2013
By WriteOrWrong BRONZE, Grosse Pointe, Michigan
WriteOrWrong BRONZE, Grosse Pointe, Michigan
3 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
Sometimes you just need to take a nap and get over it. -Maura Stuard


There's nothing you can say,
nothing you can do,
when the leaves fall down.

Summer left as fast as she came
and not a word was said.
The air just echoed your name,
and the silence reigned.

Say it ain't so,
say you're not gone.
Tell me, sweet love,
you're still in my arms.

I wait for our eyes to meet.
Disappear as you will,
but return when the sun sleeps.
Save me from these haunting hours.

Not a word was said.
The air just echoed your name,
and the silence reigned.



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This article has 15 comments.


on Aug. 5 2013 at 3:55 pm
WriteOrWrong BRONZE, Grosse Pointe, Michigan
3 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
Sometimes you just need to take a nap and get over it. -Maura Stuard

Thank you so much! I'm glad you liked it!

on Aug. 5 2013 at 11:27 am
ImAKeeper SILVER, Missouri City, Texas
6 articles 0 photos 30 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I am the master of my fate. I am the captain of my soul."- William Ernest Henley

Wow! This was really good! I feel like everyone connected to your poem in their own way. There was a definite mysterious element to the writing but that kept it interesting. The poem also flowed really well too! Great work! I loved it! (:

on Aug. 3 2013 at 10:56 am
WriteOrWrong BRONZE, Grosse Pointe, Michigan
3 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
Sometimes you just need to take a nap and get over it. -Maura Stuard

Oh yeah, no problem, I just wanted to let you know that I had commented.

on Aug. 1 2013 at 6:48 pm
WriteOrWrong BRONZE, Grosse Pointe, Michigan
3 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
Sometimes you just need to take a nap and get over it. -Maura Stuard

Thank you so much, that means a lot to me.

Mckay ELITE said...
on Aug. 1 2013 at 5:37 pm
Mckay ELITE, Somewhere, Virginia
146 articles 0 photos 2260 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do."
—Apple’s “Think Different” commercial, 1997
“Crazy people are considered mad by the rest of the society only because their intelligence isn't understood.”
― Weihui Zhou

Yes, I'm sorry I haven't replied back yet. I'm so caught up right now with having to comment on like a million people right now. But thank you in advance. 

on Aug. 1 2013 at 4:36 pm
MissExploration BRONZE, Vancouver, Washington
1 article 0 photos 112 comments

Favorite Quote:
It Can Only Fly When It Needs To.

This is one of my favorite poems I have read so far! I don't really know what the narrator is talking about, but that is what I like about this poem. I can assume and think through what the person is saying. Each person who reads this should have a different view on what it means. Amazing job!

on Jul. 31 2013 at 7:23 pm
WriteOrWrong BRONZE, Grosse Pointe, Michigan
3 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
Sometimes you just need to take a nap and get over it. -Maura Stuard

Wow, that is such a compliment. Thank you so much! I'm glad it came across that way.

on Jul. 31 2013 at 4:26 pm
LoonyLoopyLupin GOLD, Raynham, Massachusetts
13 articles 0 photos 52 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I am proud of who I am. I believe in what I do." -Pavel Chekov (Star Trek The Original Series, episode: "The Way To Eden")

This poem makes me think. It's not clear to the outside reader what exactly you're talking about. That is by no means a bad thing. This is poetry, and the reader doesn't have to know everything, and the fact that you still got such a powerful feeling across while keeping the reader a little bit in the dark is beautiful. It gives this piece a delicate, mysterious mood. You managed to tell your story in a way that just about every reader can relate to in their own unique way. That's a powerful talent you've got there. :)

on Jul. 31 2013 at 3:58 pm
WriteOrWrong BRONZE, Grosse Pointe, Michigan
3 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
Sometimes you just need to take a nap and get over it. -Maura Stuard

Just to let you know I commented on 'the Worlds Not Ready Yet,' and 'I Don't Believe in Counting Stars.'

on Jul. 31 2013 at 3:41 pm
WriteOrWrong BRONZE, Grosse Pointe, Michigan
3 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
Sometimes you just need to take a nap and get over it. -Maura Stuard

Thanks a lot! I really appreciate it. Let me know if you would like any more feedback, I'd be more than happy to.

on Jul. 31 2013 at 11:12 am
writefearless SILVER, Manila, Other
8 articles 0 photos 48 comments

Favorite Quote:
scare your fear before it scares you.

this is awesome! i love the paradox in  line, "Summer left as fast as she came"  it's so clever!  and also the repetition of the stanza, it added a more powerful effect. very good! :)

on Jul. 30 2013 at 5:02 pm
WriteOrWrong BRONZE, Grosse Pointe, Michigan
3 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
Sometimes you just need to take a nap and get over it. -Maura Stuard

Aww shucks, thank you! I am really happy you enjoyed it. You are too sweet!

on Jul. 30 2013 at 3:07 pm
Superhero_Fan SILVER, Tomorrowland, California
7 articles 1 photo 163 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Impossible; for How many people did you know who refracted your own light to you?” - Fahrenheit 451

Wow. That was amazing! You had a steady rhythm, an even flow, and a touch af mystery. I loved how you incorporated the sun in the fourth stanza. Thank you for writing this!

Mckay ELITE said...
on Jul. 29 2013 at 6:45 pm
Mckay ELITE, Somewhere, Virginia
146 articles 0 photos 2260 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do."
—Apple’s “Think Different” commercial, 1997
“Crazy people are considered mad by the rest of the society only because their intelligence isn't understood.”
― Weihui Zhou

Again, I have no critiques. Just to keep writing. Interesting title. And beautiful imagery. 

on Jul. 26 2013 at 8:32 am
SwanSong SILVER, Millville, New Jersey
9 articles 0 photos 54 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the moments that take our breath away."

I have no critiques to offer you for this poem. The rhythm is flawless and your imagry in beautiful. The first stanza is strong and it sets up a nice beginning for the rest of the poem. Oh! I did notice, like your last poem, that you switch between referring to "her" in second person and third person. Personally, I like this more when it's in second person. Fantastic work!


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