Stained | Teen Ink

Stained MAG

January 23, 2010
By IsobelFree DIAMOND, Hamilton, Other
IsobelFree DIAMOND, Hamilton, Other
71 articles 20 photos 296 comments

Favorite Quote:
"As long as there is open road, the familiar has the most formidable competitor." - Anonymous


“Dance with me?”
In the end, you refused to
judge me for my sweat-stained pink T-shirt.
I still find it hard to believe you'd
look past my shaking, grass-smeared denim knees.
I assumed you would
turn me down, as if out of embarrassment.
But how could you
be so accepting?
I knew you couldn't
be what everyone said you were.
You really turned out to
be kind of sweet.
I think I believed that you would
be like this.
I knew, deep down, you would.
In a sea of sticky, hot bodies,
all awkward legs and big feet,
we flashed, multi-colored, under the cheap strobe lights.
The school gym's ceiling was strung with crepe paper;
your freckled cheeks were dyed blue, then green, then red.
We stood facing each other, your hazel eyes piercing my brown ones,
with only a small distance between us.

With only a small distance between us,
we stood facing each other, your hazel eyes piercing my brown ones.
Your freckled cheeks were dyed blue, then green, then red;
the school gym's ceiling was strung with crepe paper.
We flashed, multi-colored, under the cheap strobe lights,
all awkward legs and big feet,
in a sea of sticky, hot bodies.
I knew, deep down, you would
be like this.
I think I believed that you would
be kind of sweet.
You really turned out to
be what everyone said you were.
I knew you couldn't
be so accepting.
But how could you
turn me down, as if out of embarrassment?
I assumed you would
look past my shaking, grass-smeared denim knees.
I still find it hard to believe you'd
judge me for my sweat-stained pink T-shirt.
In the end, you refused to
dance with me.


The author's comments:
The assignment: create a poem that makes sense forwards as well as backwards, evokes a clear sense of imagery and emotion, is based on a real-life experience/memory, and means something different in the second stanza than it does in the first. This is the one I handed in for the Lit assignment, but also check out "I'm Sorry" and "Sweater", as they were contendors to hand in.

Similar Articles

JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 6 comments.


on Jan. 2 2011 at 3:29 pm
IsobelFree DIAMOND, Hamilton, Other
71 articles 20 photos 296 comments

Favorite Quote:
"As long as there is open road, the familiar has the most formidable competitor." - Anonymous

Aww, thank you everyone! Yeah it was hard, but it was fun - and once you start writing poems like this, you can't stop! For weeks afterwards, I couldn't write a poem without thinking of how it would sound backwards :)

on Jan. 2 2011 at 12:33 am
lilmartz PLATINUM, Perrysburg, Ohio
40 articles 5 photos 163 comments

Favorite Quote:
Live Life Like A Party That Never Ends

This seems like it was a really tough assignment, but you did it flawlessly. This poem is amazing in both ways. Please keep writing :)

Xadon BRONZE said...
on Jan. 1 2011 at 11:46 pm
Xadon BRONZE, Cheney, Kansas
1 article 0 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Joy, something that is found in small cracks and hiding places that we can only see when our eyes are closed"---Me. ( Yeah, i made myself a quote deal with it.)

It was heartbreaking and yet sweet and loveing the reapting made it better. Keep writing.

on Jan. 1 2011 at 2:29 pm
justsmileanddance PLATINUM, Montgomery, Alabama
28 articles 42 photos 67 comments

Favorite Quote:
Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.
-Albus Dumbledore

love ti!! love how its the opposite forward and backwards with a different ending! love it!

Kels_W. BRONZE said...
on Dec. 31 2010 at 3:20 pm
Kels_W. BRONZE, Kempton, Pennsylvania
1 article 0 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
Twitter-paited. They're all twitter-paited!!!

~Friend Owl, Bambi

Love it! the same words in different a different order evokes polar opposite emotions. It has wonderful flow and is easy to make sense of.

on Dec. 31 2010 at 12:42 am
folababy BRONZE,
2 articles 0 photos 1 comment
the assingment did not sound easy but i think you did a great job at it! both stanzas evoke two different feelings while using the same words. i liked it.