I wish I wasn't in this situation. This situation of this love that I have found. She lives so far, but my heart yearns so close. The dreams I have of one simple request, one simple wish. For her to be closer, and to fulfill my lonely heart. If she would be my neighbor, if she would be my classmate, if she could come close at the expense of any sacrifice. I would! If we could stop time and be together with all and every trouble gone, the happiness that would ensue and forever fill me would become my state of consciousness. If! If! If! No dream no wish can make this hope be real, no fantasy, no trance can let this happen. And yet I flail and thrash hoping that this will happen. I weep at the one simple factor that fuels this sadness: she is too far.

The distance has once discouraged me, now it pains me. My mind, my terrible hurtful mind, drowned me in my own guilt, my own shame. For it, as it would appear, longs for its own depression, it's own death. Our minds are really quite mean, they fall in love with someone that can not be pursued, they chose to love even though that love won’t develop. It would seem that their goal would be to strive for unhappiness. Even when love lies so close.