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To An Old Friend

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Cutting me out of your “perfect” life, hurt me.
They're rarely spoken about, but I do have feelings.
And I know friendships are never a guarantee,
but you didn’t even think twice about leaving.
We shared so many memories together.
You were someone I related to.
But I guess being best friends forever
never meant anything to you.
I wish I had seen
what you were truly like, sooner.
That you’d never choose me if it was between
myself and someone higher up on the social ladder.
Why wasn’t I good enough for you?
Was it because I couldn’t keep up with the latest trends?
I don’t know because you blew
me off as if we weren’t even best friends.
I feel stupid and naive,
when thinking about everything.
But most of all, I feel incomplete
because I have not started healing.
I also never got my closure
because you didn’t talk to me.
And I try to keep my composure,
so maybe you can’t see
that I am angry.
We were best friends for so long,
and frankly,
you led me on.
We were not in a relationship,
but I wish you had broken up with me
because we were in a long-term friendship
and I could have gotten the closure I need.
Because now I am stuck hating you.
Hate is a strong word,
so I only use it when I have to.
And when it comes to you, it’s use is required.
All that being said,
I miss you, nonetheless.
However, when I look ahead,
I think and hope that I will finally oppress
those feelings I dread
because I will move on and see
that you never truly cared about my feelings.
And I know our friendship was never a guarantee
but at least I thought twice about leaving.




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