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My Downfall

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Saying all you need
with your eyes, I know I have
failed you once again.

Your blank expression
is the worst thing that you can
do or say to me.

That condescending,
cold stare wears me down; freezes
my insides solid.

The second you look
away I will sprint, not with
my feet, but my mind.




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This article has 4 comments. Post your own!

sunnyandsugarThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
today at 2:04 pm:
Hello you commeneted on my work ages ago and I decided to revisit yours:) Beautiful piece.I love how you say you will sprint with your mind instead of your feet. Very interesting. Anyways your very talented keep up the writing! X
 
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MckayThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Sep. 29 at 10:56 pm:
Really lays the guilt on you, doesn't it? I like the feeling it gives off. Not necessarily an easy or comfortable one. It makes you squirm and sort of hate yourself. And that's what makes a great poem like this one. Not all poems should make you feel good. There must be poems that make you loathe the bad in you like this poem does. Really well done, friend. Do not quit writing! 
 
ChrisJThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Sep. 30 at 7:13 pm :
Just exactly what I was going for: an unsettling piece that conveys the uneasy guilt, regret, and uncertainty that lingers inside us all at some point in life. Thank you very much for the kind response, and congrats on Blood Bath, its a really wondeful poem!
 
MckayThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Oct. 1 at 1:32 pm :
You certainly succeed in doing so. (And thank you!) 
 
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