automaton | Teen Ink

automaton

May 9, 2013
By Mckay ELITE, Somewhere, Virginia
Mckay ELITE, Somewhere, Virginia
146 articles 0 photos 2260 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do."
—Apple’s “Think Different” commercial, 1997
“Crazy people are considered mad by the rest of the society only because their intelligence isn't understood.”
― Weihui Zhou


limbs like human limbs
and an intelligence that
surpasses our own

but within that frame
of oxidizing metal
no heart palpitates

mechanically
you toil trudge toil but you won’t
know what love can be


The author's comments:
Inspired by the automaton in Martin Scorcese's Hugo.

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This article has 4 comments.


Mckay ELITE said...
on Oct. 11 2013 at 6:50 pm
Mckay ELITE, Somewhere, Virginia
146 articles 0 photos 2260 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do."
—Apple’s “Think Different” commercial, 1997
“Crazy people are considered mad by the rest of the society only because their intelligence isn't understood.”
― Weihui Zhou

James, thank you so much for the thorough feedback. I appreciate it when someone take the time to decipher the poem then put his/her thoughts about it and extra. Thanks! 

on Sep. 23 2013 at 11:41 am
BlackbeltJames GOLD, Reading, Other
14 articles 0 photos 193 comments

Favorite Quote:
Isaac Asimov - "Intelligence is an accident of evolution, and not necessarily an advantage.”

Automaton isn't a word that people use very often, but as a fan of Asimov and having read and written a lot of my own robot stories, this instantly caught my attention (call me a nerd, I deserve it haha).
I really liked the poem, it was honest and true, it had a clever and effective description and gave across the point. I really liked it, but are they really more intelligent? Is obeying orders endlessly and unquestionably intelligence, can you truly be intelligent without the comprahension of emotions or without creativity? I could honestly have endless debates, although I don't always believe in those points, it is still a valid question to think about. It adds a depth to the poem as it makes the reader think as well, not just accept fact/opinion.
I really like it :)

Mckay ELITE said...
on May. 29 2013 at 3:04 pm
Mckay ELITE, Somewhere, Virginia
146 articles 0 photos 2260 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do."
—Apple’s “Think Different” commercial, 1997
“Crazy people are considered mad by the rest of the society only because their intelligence isn't understood.”
― Weihui Zhou

I hadn't really thought of it in that way. I'm so happy you caught that. And I'm thankful you took time to decipher it. Thanks so much, Christi. 

on May. 26 2013 at 12:30 pm
Helena_Noel BRONZE, Burnt Hills, New York
1 article 0 photos 629 comments

Favorite Quote:
“I'd rather see a sermon than hear one any day; I'd rather one should walk with me than merely tell the way: The eye's a better pupil and more willing than the ear, fine counsel is confusing, but example's always clear.” -Edgar Guest

Awesome. I liked the image of oxidizing metal, rusting meta and no heart, especially followed by your thought on how they "toilntrudge toil" in the next part. It gave it a feel thatnthe emotionless life of drudgery was wearing it away. And the rather uncommon and over-exact words "oxidizing", "palpitates", help to give it the automated, emotionless feel.


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