Your Eyes

October 15, 2012
By Stella_Val_Illicia GOLD, Salt Lake City, Utah
Stella_Val_Illicia GOLD, Salt Lake City, Utah
13 articles 0 photos 248 comments

Favorite Quote:
"In the beginning, the universe was created. This has made a lot of people angry and been widely regarded as a bad idea."
--Douglas Adams


Like glass in the sea
Tarns in early morning hours
When dawn mist rises

Wisps of smokey gray
Ashes of a thousand years
So it seems to me

Worn and wise and well
Words written across your face
Expressive yet closed

Hidden to others
I decipher your labyrinth
I read your lyrics

You say so little
Yet you are so clear to me
Simply through your eyes


The author's comments:
This is random, about a really expressive person and another who is evaluating them. I was really trying to make this work. Please, tell me what you think :)

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This article has 10 comments.


on Feb. 18 2013 at 4:28 pm
GreekGoddess BRONZE, Andover, Connecticut
3 articles 0 photos 182 comments

Favorite Quote:
I'm not superstitious, I believe in irony.
~Me

I like this. It shows how she - or he - loves the other with the deepest part of their heart. Great describtion of the other person. Great job!

on Dec. 27 2012 at 11:00 am
GuardianoftheStars GOLD, Shongaloo, Louisiana
17 articles 0 photos 495 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Let's tell young people the best books are yet to be written; the best painting, the best government, the best of everything is yet to be done by them."
-John Erslcine

Beautiful is a good word to describe this I think :)

on Dec. 8 2012 at 7:05 pm
TaylorWintry DIAMOND, Carrollton, Texas
72 articles 0 photos 860 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Never fear shadows. They simply mean there's a light shining somewhere nearby." - Unknown

Brilliant. This is really good. I loved the metaphors you used in this piece. If you want to put a twist on your writing, I think that adding a rhyme scheme (not a children's poem) to it would make it creepier. When I think of rhyme schemes, I think of a witch casting a spell. (: This is really fantastic, though. GReat job.

anonymous said...
on Nov. 10 2012 at 2:15 pm
Yes you do AthenaMarisaDeterminedbyFate.  Ha.  I searched you and found you.  Funny that Athena should write poems about Athena.

on Oct. 19 2012 at 12:34 pm
live4words SILVER, Bigfork, Montana
5 articles 4 photos 23 comments

Favorite Quote:
Never give up on something you can't go a day without thinking about.

I really like this! Your descriptions are beautiful, and yet they still leave room for the imagination (which is a good thing!) Its very, very poetic and... dark? No, that really isn't the right word. More like deep. It's poetic and deep and I really like it! You are talented! Keep up the good work! :)

on Oct. 18 2012 at 7:36 pm
larissaecm SILVER, Victoria, Other
7 articles 0 photos 44 comments
soooo goood!!!

on Oct. 18 2012 at 6:26 pm
Misfit95 PLATINUM, Dover, Ohio
26 articles 0 photos 97 comments
Love this <3333

on Oct. 18 2012 at 2:45 pm
alwayssunshine PLATINUM, Charlotte, North Carolina
24 articles 5 photos 147 comments
"Words written across your face..." Lovely!

on Oct. 16 2012 at 6:35 pm
Stella_Val_Illicia GOLD, Salt Lake City, Utah
13 articles 0 photos 248 comments

Favorite Quote:
"In the beginning, the universe was created. This has made a lot of people angry and been widely regarded as a bad idea."
--Douglas Adams

Thanks! I write too much... :)

on Oct. 16 2012 at 6:18 pm
Cat-Girl PLATINUM, Nyania, Planet Nyan, Oklahoma
20 articles 7 photos 56 comments

Favorite Quote:
"That's what's wrong with the people in this world; they believe they can do well by just getting by when they need to aim for the highest."
-Keith Anderson
"You can never hope to build a better world without improving the individuals."
-Marie Curie

This has great comparison and metaphor, plus a hidden story behind it. Also, awesome description! I love your work :)


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