Without Beauty

November 10, 2009
By Fayrouz SILVER, Fargo, North Dakota
Fayrouz SILVER, Fargo, North Dakota
9 articles 12 photos 364 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Only dead fish swim with the stream"


She cannot see,
What she possesses,
Without beauty,
She still impresses.


The author's comments:
This poem is about how beauty is not the dominant way to impress, but most people certainly think it is. When a girl wants to impress, she reaches for make-up and clothes

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This article has 26 comments.


on Nov. 4 2015 at 9:23 am
Ty_M_Payne BRONZE, Plaquemine, Louisiana
3 articles 0 photos 3 comments
This poem explains what guys should know. Not all girls care about how they look to get a good first impression. Most girls say “if you can’t take me at my worst you surely can’t me at my best.” Girls are beauty without makeup; they choose to wear it though.

Fayrouz SILVER said...
on Dec. 24 2011 at 5:17 pm
Fayrouz SILVER, Fargo, North Dakota
9 articles 12 photos 364 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Only dead fish swim with the stream"

thanks :) I just thought I'd get an extra opinion.

on Dec. 24 2011 at 2:15 pm
poetrylyrics BRONZE, Helena, Arkansas
1 article 0 photos 19 comments

Favorite Quote:
1)I will be grateful in all circumstances.
2)The measure of a life, after all, is not its duration, but its donation

She cannot see, What she possesses, Without beauty, She still impresses this tells me that beauty is as you say skills etc. i think its the perfect length it gives the eader more to define to break down instead of overcommunicating .

Fayrouz SILVER said...
on Dec. 22 2011 at 6:35 pm
Fayrouz SILVER, Fargo, North Dakota
9 articles 12 photos 364 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Only dead fish swim with the stream"

Thanks for your comment :) I'm glad you enjoyed the poem, but I do have to ask you a question: some people say that although they understand the message I'm sending, the way the poem is worded is stereotypical--that is, I'm assuming beauty is only "good looks," when it can actually be in any form: skills, talent, commitment to others, etc. Do you feel that, while reading the poem, it doesn't accurately relay its message? I like the way it is, short and simply rhyming...do you think it should be longer? Thanks for all your feedback, I truly appreciate it!

on Dec. 22 2011 at 1:42 pm
beautifulspirit PLATINUM, Alpharetta, Georgia
35 articles 0 photos 1401 comments

Favorite Quote:
The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.
--Eleanor Roosevelt

Yeah I agree. This poem explains that even without beauty, you can shock and amaze others.

on Oct. 21 2011 at 9:18 am
poetrylyrics BRONZE, Helena, Arkansas
1 article 0 photos 19 comments

Favorite Quote:
1)I will be grateful in all circumstances.
2)The measure of a life, after all, is not its duration, but its donation

Beauty does not define a person. I think this poem tells us that. Check out my first poen .  : )

on Jul. 25 2011 at 5:04 pm
GirlLovingLife SILVER, Rocky Ford, Colorado
5 articles 0 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
"There are some secrets which do not permit themselves to be told."
— Edgar Allan Poe

This is a really good poem and your right people always think that its what on the inside that counts but they are wrong...you proved that with this poem...

hiii said...
on Apr. 6 2011 at 12:00 pm
i like how the poem rhymes. it sounds like song lyrics.

kayllaax3 said...
on Apr. 6 2011 at 11:59 am
Good poem(: It was really good and had a nice rhythm to it.

on Feb. 10 2011 at 2:51 pm
Lilybean17 SILVER, Las Vegas, Nevada
5 articles 0 photos 7 comments
very true for most girls!

on Sep. 20 2010 at 4:38 pm
CammyLashay SILVER, Java, Virginia
9 articles 0 photos 32 comments

Favorite Quote:
Failure is not for me.

i also took noticee but its an good poem

on Aug. 29 2010 at 11:53 am
DiamondsIntheGrass GOLD, Martinsville, New Jersey
14 articles 1 photo 279 comments

Favorite Quote:
Worry is simply a misuse of the imagination.

this is really nice, but last i recall, a haiku is a three line poem.

on May. 31 2010 at 12:48 am
Yael Spivakovsky BRONZE, Brooklyn, New York
2 articles 0 photos 5 comments
great job.

kysh15 said...
on Mar. 25 2010 at 9:46 pm
kysh15, Edmonds, Washington
0 articles 0 photos 58 comments
I love how so much is said in only four lines

on Feb. 20 2010 at 7:43 am
LihuaEmily SILVER, North Kingstown, Rhode Island
7 articles 3 photos 199 comments

Favorite Quote:
"It is said that there's no such thing as a free lunch. But the universe is the ultimate free lunch." -Alan Guth

Oh yes, absolutely marvelous. (I should tell you ... Barnes and Noble is my favorite store as well!)

on Jan. 20 2010 at 11:58 am
Secret_Love_Tells GOLD, Harrisonburg, Virginia
15 articles 0 photos 70 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I love you more than the sun loves the sky and the moon loves the stars" --my best friend
"Do it for love." --sark
"One does not succeed in never falling but in getting back up evertime they do so."- Confucius

This is really good! It expresses what goes on in just a few lines! Amazing!

dule05 BRONZE said...
on Jan. 15 2010 at 8:53 pm
dule05 BRONZE, Kraljevo, Other
1 article 1 photo 107 comments

Favorite Quote:
"In the end, the only people who fail are those who do not try." ~David Viscott

thanks :) I actually posted it here just for one reason, to see what I need to improve in the future, so hence I'm going to withdraw it because I wrote it a year ago. However, I'm going to post another story so we will see. Anyways, I wish you the best of luck in your writing, if you need me, let me know :)

Fayrouz SILVER said...
on Jan. 15 2010 at 8:31 pm
Fayrouz SILVER, Fargo, North Dakota
9 articles 12 photos 364 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Only dead fish swim with the stream"

now that you mention your intents and ideas, blissfully_loved, i understand your story more and i appreciate its value more. however, i won't lose my ground that the author should clarify things to the reader but still leave some room for imagination. however, not too much room b/c the reader can't read the author's mind. however, your story wasn't too vague and rereading it...i enjoyed it better after knowing your view on it. thanks for criticing my writing :)

dule05 BRONZE said...
on Jan. 8 2010 at 11:49 pm
dule05 BRONZE, Kraljevo, Other
1 article 1 photo 107 comments

Favorite Quote:
"In the end, the only people who fail are those who do not try." ~David Viscott

Well i am glad to hear that!

Surely i will check it out but I have to go and sleep now, I'm very tired. Speaking of my story I really appreciate everyone's opinion, but you mustn't forget that my story has lots of comments and many people praised my work as well as understood it, so I guess it depends on an individual and I can't do much about it. Everyone who thinks about it a bit longer will realize the ending cause there must be a reason why i ended it that way. And here is the explanation for you. First of all, it was a series of dreams and what is a dream then? Dreams are confusing, unclear, quite messy, we don't know why we dream something or who we are going to dream about. So my story has to satisfy all these dream rules, that's why I had to make it a bit confusing and stuff. Second of all, dreams are short so my story had to be short as well and third of all you never know when you are going to wake up from a dream do you? No, you don't so hence that's why my story had to end so suddenly, it wouldn't have been a dream if hadn't ended suddenly. Do you get it now? I had to follow these dream rule otherwise my story would lose its value and you never know why you never get explanations in dream do you? So I didn't give it as well and your remark was also that I should have described a man on the farm more, no I shouldn't because he is of no importance at all and dreams are too short to be wasted on some unimportant details...As you can see, I perfectly accomplished these dream rules in my story and that's what makes me satisfied no matter what will someone say cause I know I did a right thing.

dule05 BRONZE said...
on Jan. 8 2010 at 9:29 pm
dule05 BRONZE, Kraljevo, Other
1 article 1 photo 107 comments

Favorite Quote:
"In the end, the only people who fail are those who do not try." ~David Viscott

Hello Fayrouz,

First of all, sorry if my article offended you, I must say that it just stimulated me to write about some things that are quite forgotten in everyday life, the motif you used(beauty) made me think and express my emotions. Speaking of your poem, I understood what you meant and I think you did manage to express your message well, but the selection of the words was quite mistaken especially the construction 'without beauty' which caught my eye immediately. I like your opinion that physique is not the only thing that matters, but you had to choose carefully how to convey such a message cause it could lead to the contradiction(what is it else that captivates people around the girl if not her beauty?), that's my only remark to you, try to find some other words. You suggested 'without pretty' but you know that 'pretty' is either adjective or adverb and you need a noun so in this case 'pretty' would a bit inappropriate, try finding some other word. And honestly you could really work on its length, I have nothing against short poems but I think that the theme you chose demands a more thorough devotion. Hope it helps.

-blissfully_loved

P.S. I thank you for your comments on my story too, I wish I hadn't made a few pronunciation errors on "Restless soul" but on the other hand, they are not the reason why I should not be satisfied with my story when everything else is fine, I know that the ending made many readers confused but trust me, I wish I could have explained to you why it had to end that way, if i could, you would see that it really makes sense...if you are eager to find out, maybe you could give me an email so I could let you know cause I don't want anyone else to see the explanation, I want them to think xDD


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