If you turn your work in on time--

I will grade your paper with the mellowness of frolicking in two patches of sun yellow flowers. I will draw a lemon yellow sun on your paper and give you a nice dense Thank You when you walk into the room if you turn your work in on time. Your grade will subtly fly into the gradebook immediately, as quickly as light to bring your burning grade up to high sky. Your life will be great and all the sweat that you put into your wonderful project will be rewarded in a high standard way.

If you do not turn your work in on time—

I will grade your paper with the harshness of 1000 suns. I will inspect every phrase and grammatical letter that is written on this paper that is now mine. I will be deviant and look at the form and wave of your letters with an electron magnifying glass. Your paper will receive great review and triumph to me to grade your paper with more harshness than the land of the underworld. I will make sure every teacher looks at your work with high expectations and wise wisdom. Your burning grade will go low with this low blow of a late paper.