Sometimes, I just want to quit.
Quit school... quit my life.
not commit suicide, no, just cease to exist.
this obviously makes me a bad person, I know.
what good person could feel this way with all I have?
School, a home, a loving boyfriend and family...
and its not good enough to fix me.
Anxiety grips me tightly and depression holds me hostage
Nothing seems worth the trouble.
I am not satisfied, but cannot be bothered to change.
I feel worthless, like I mean nothing,
like i AM nothing.
How dare I feel so terrible when there aree so many living worse lives than I?
people are starving and dying in the streets and I hate my life?
The struggle to maintain control is exhausting.
I agonize and lose sleep, i snap at those around me.
Its easier not to care, simpler to distract myself than to deal
distraction is a double edged sword
I am okay for a while, but am punished with a feeling of uselessness when I accomplish nothing
How long can a person go on feeling this way?
Its clear Im not strong to take it.
Perhaps drugs could dull the ache... and mask the hurt within.